Spam by any other name

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I probably get an average of about 150 spam comments per day. Some days more, some less. Fortunately, the spam filter catches them all, but I thought it was sort of a shame that these hard working spam bots never get their chance at publication here on my blog.
Why, some of them are downright poetic:

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Superior Knowledges by Independent Geneva Escorts
Are grateful for present superior knowledges
Your website is definitely fine
I am stunned at the data you which you have
Within this blogging site
That proves exactly how you have this target
Saved as a favorite, these pages
Will come back for further
We, my buddy
Are a blast!
I discovered, merely, the material
I undoubtedly checked pretty much everywhere
And just couldn’t search for it
College thinks
Fantastic web-site!

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праститутки модели by HEWTEEDIADIAF
астраханские проститутки фото
порно проститутки трансы питера
толстые проститутки сургута
проститутки лангепас
объявления проституток на орск ru

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Download movies torrent (A haiku by River Darkness)
To watch a movie
Download movies torrent films
Download the movie

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Thanks for Lunch by Tory Burch Handbags
Excellent read
Just passed it on to a colleague
He actually bought me lunch
Because I found it for him (Smile)
So let me rephrase that
Thanks for lunch!

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Guide to dating women by Aletlepen
He also praised supporting cast
Guide to dating women
A secretary is an administrative assistant
Dating fender amplifier
Business office administration
Lemon tonic dating service
And in pacing a song,
Beautiful dating people site
Dylan pauses at certain points, so as to
Lemon tonic dating service
Make two syllables occupy time and space
Guide to dating women
That in the basic scheme of things will be
Native American dating sites
Expected to be occupied by four syllables
Guide to dating women

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Stay on Topic by Spectral DC
Can we get back on topic please?
Everything seems to have gotten off the subject.
Some of these comments are unbelievable.
(Okay, that one could actually be a real comment.)
So how about you? Have any interesting spam comments lately?
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I’m jealous. I haven’t gotten any comments in Russian yet.
That Russian comment is quite interesting – it has something to do with prostitutes. (Thank you, freetranslation.com!) And a haiku, too? Darn, I should be reading more of my spam comments before I delete them. You have a great eye for stuff like that, Kathy. Thanks for showing that with the proper frame, even spam can become art!
That’s pure genius – turning spam into poetry.
My personal blog is on Blogger; I administer two blogs on WordPress — and I have to say that WordPress is vastly more accepting of spam than Blogger.
You did it. You went and created a post with spam comments. These are hilarious. I get some doozies, too. But I NOW CROWN YOU AS SPAM QUEEN.
150 a day is a lot.
I posted about the car e-book spam a couple of weeks ago.
http://randommusings-helen.blogspot.com/2011/02/why-i-dont-need-e-book-to-help-me-buy.html
You know what irks me? Why is unwanted email named after delicious luncheon meat? It should be called friend liver without onions!
Oooops… I meant fried liver without onions.
I would never eat a friend’s liver, with or without onions.
Well, I never…
I take personal offense to that last can of spam.
(I bet my can of Whoop is bigger than his/her can of spam.)
Anybody who comments on THIS blog taking umbrage at the fact that we get off topic has no idea what this blog is about!
Kathy LOVES it when we get off topic. It cracks her up!
Please don’t use such big words this early, miss Helen. Umbrage. What is that? An umbrella for the aged? What were we talking about? That’s right. Kathy has cracked something and needs some glue. Have you heard of gorilla glue? Me, I’m a duct tape and baling twine sort of gal. Gorilla glue, maybe if one works in a zoo.
Mister “Stay on Topic,” my comment train may have gone done and jumped the track, but I am taking Helen with me so take that! 😉
Duct tape…. Ahh…. the memories…… 🙂
My daddy used to wrap duct tape around leaky pipes before going to the hardware store and getting new pipes…..
Like I don’t get enough of this poetry in my own inbox I have to come read it on your site? Have you been hanging with Charlie Sheen?
Lately, I’ve been getting hundreds of spams from someone wanting me to buy shower trays from the UK. I don’t know what kind of soap caddies the Brits use, but they must be really awesome for them to pour so much attention on me!
Sweet Fancy Moses! The shower tray people are EVERYWHERE! What’s a shower tray, anyway?
don’t you know?
some eat breakfast in bed
– on breakfast trays.
some eat dinner in the living room
– on TV trays.
the brits must must eat their mid-day mush
– while they shower!
We should definitely ask Peter Pollock about that! 🙂
“Lemon tonic dating service”
Sounds like a bad Seattle grunge band from 1994.
I’ve had some that mentioned how big and happy I am. Which is true. I am big and normally happy. So at least they had something right.
I’m big and happy, too, but I’ll find and sock any spammer who tells me so!
The hot water situation in the UK is a disaster and so frustrating that you need to have some servicable spot for shower accoutrements – edible or non. Have mercy on them at least.
The best one lately said something along the lines that they completely disagreed with what I wrote and was going to write a rebuttal on their site. And that I should follow the link.
His name was Viagra Guy.
’tis a sign of a quality blog when your commenters make me laugh {almost} as much as the post. I should be so classy, to get haiku spam.
Too funny. Yeah I like the ones that sound like they could be real then you read there’s 15 more that say the exact same them. Busted. Thanks for the laugh, Kat.