Katdish.net

Oh, it’s been too long since my last katdishionary post. From the blog that brought you such words as Pornographic Cheese Buttler, Skymalladocious, Fatassatosis, the Jesus Frying Pan and many, many more, katdish.net is pleased to present Part 12 of this neverending fountain of blog fodder: katdishionary, Part 12, the Florida Edition:

For those of you who haven’t been here in awhile, first of all, shame on you.

Secondly, you may not be aware that I recently spent the better part of a week in the land of Micky Mouse and all things touristy, Orlando, Florida.

The purpose of said trip was to attend Exponential: the largest gathering of church planters in the Universe. (It’s not billed as such, but I’m gonna take a stab in the dark and assume there aren’t some alien life forms gathering to talk about Jesus at some huge interplanetary mega church. Even though that would be pretty cool.) Anyway, I ranted incessantly about it a little last week, meant to share a little more with you, but then the non-virtual world was calling me, so I’m just now getting around to sharing some new and exciting katdishionary words with you now–I know. You’re welcome.

Now on with the katdishionary:

Orlandosinusitus (pronounced Or-lan-doe-sign-u-site-us)

The view from our condo, overlooking the beautiful "Wet n' Wild" theme park. If you squint and look just left of center, you can see Hogwarts, which we didn't go to because last time we came to this conference, we went to Disneyworld without the kids and they're still pissed about it.

Definition: a condition of alternating runny nose to completely stopped up nose caused by the city of Orlando, Florida.

Origin: Trip to a church planter’s conference in late April. I had allergy attacks the entire trip. I’m either allergic to tourism, Florida, church planters, or some combination of all of the above. This debilitating condition forced me to go to bed each night with a Breathe-Right nasal strip adhered to the bridge of my nose and Kleenex stuffed in my nostrils. (Also? I’m bringing sexy back!)

The Mo-fauxhawk (pronounced ma-fo-hawk)

This is the closest version of what I would truly define as an actual Mofauxhawk. See further description below.

Definition: Edgier version of the fauxhawk, where there is what appears to be an actual mohawk centered on the top of the head

surrounded by the classic fauxhawk on either side.

Imagine if you will a well manicured box hedge lined on either side with monkey grass. Now put that atop someone’s head and you have the Mo-fauxhawk.

Incidentally, it looks nothing at all like this:

Origin: People watching at the Exponential Conference.

A Scarf too Far, or AS2F (pronounced a-skarf-too-far)

The following are all elements of the Christian hipster look:

The Christian/tribal tatt

The free-for-all facial hair look

The lacoste porkpie hat

The Spongebob Squarepants glasses

Skinny jeans

The ugly shoe with a heart of gold: Toms

The Ricky Lee Jones throwback beanie

The nerdy/environmentally correct tee

The peacoat with deep front pockets to plunge your hands into while walking purposefully.

and, of course…

The ginormous scarf

This is only a partial list. Feel free to include body piercings, those big hockey puck earrings, the man-purse (murse) or something else I’ve forgotten. They can be mixed and matched (or mismatched as the case may be), but an attempt to incorporate too many into one outfit will result in what I like to call A Scarf Too Far (AS2F) and turn them into the very thing they fear the most: a walking cliche’.

Origin: People watching at Exponential.

The Chewpacca (pronounced chew-pa-ka)

Chewpacca

Definition: A large, inexpensive duffle bag on wheels which can be purchased at the Super Target on the way to the Orlando airport when you’ve exceeded the 50 pound weight limit on your luggage and don’t want to pay the extra 50 bucks they charge you for going SEVEN POUNDS OVER.

Wheels designed for maximum noise creation.

The wheels are designed in such a way as to make the loudest noise possible when pulled across an airport parking lot, and when pulled across the moving walkway once inside the airport, to my delight and everyone else’s annoyance, they sound almost exactly like this:

(You should play that video two or three times. It is THAT delightful!)

Origin: Jeff Hogan. Who, after walking behind me and my new duffle bag named him Chewbacca.

This concludes the latest edition of the katdishionary. Please remember that many of the words contained therein have come from alert readers (including the term “katdishionary”), so keep those cards and letters coming!

image courtesy of photobucket.com

This post began as a much anticipated and highly procrastinated Katdishionary post. The term “assholiness” was one of several new terms I feel warrant entry into the annals of my own version of Webster’s, but I think this term deserves its own post, because I like to keep the definitions brief in Ye Olde Katdishionary. This one needs a little more of an explanation.

The term assholiness first popped into my head several months back when a few high profile Christians began to publicly berate Rob Bell’s yet to be released book Love Wins. Many were incensed that Bell had the audacity to suggest that a loving God would not send people to Hell. And while I happen to (mostly) agree with Bell’s detractors in principle, I felt some of the public discourse was downright un-Jesus-y.

For the record, I don’t think God sends anyone to Hell. That’s a choice we make for ourselves. I will also admit that I had some private conversations about the subject that were way more salty than lighty. But I resisted the urge to jump into the fray. Why? Because it’s never been my experience that you convince someone you’re right by pointing out to them publicly how wrong they are.

Honestly, how many times have you seen a situation like that turn into anything more than a pissing match?

I did write a post about it, but the point of my post wasn’t about whose team I’d be on if Rob Bell and John Piper were choosing up sides for a game of Red Rover, my point was that Rob Bell is not Jesus Christ. Neither is John Piper or Francis Chan or Billy Graham or (insert famous Christian leader here). Nor am I for that matter.

When Christians draw their theological lines in the sand, choose sides and start attacking each other, we’re not winning anyone for Christ, we’re just becoming more alienated from one another. And like it or not, if you’re a Christian, you’re part of the same Body of Christ as that fundamentalist pompous ass or that crystal-gripping tree hugging hippie that is woefully misguided and is driving you nuts. Speaking the truth in love doesn’t mean metaphorically neck punching someone with the truth and telling them you love them afterwards.

But assholiness is not a term reserved for Jesus people*. Some examples of assholiness I’ve seen come from atheists. Not all atheists, mind you, just the really angry, Christian despising kind who spend time online searching for a Christian platform where they can pick a fight. Don’t believe me? If your writing is primarily faith based in content, use the tags “atheist”, “Creationism” and “Darwin” on your next few posts and see who shows up on your blog. You may want to turn on comments moderation before you do that, the f-bomb seems to get dropped a lot.

Regardless of your faith or lack thereof, anytime our need to be right takes precedence over all else, it’s counterproductive. You may have a huge following who agree with everything you believe is wrong with that other guy, but like my friend and pastor Jeff says, when all you have in common is a common enemy, once that enemy is gone you will either lose the group or seek another enemy to fill the void.

I’m not interested in building that kind of following.

How about you?

*Jesus people is a term borrowed from my friend Jake Lee without his permission, but hopefully he won’t mind so much.

That’s right, people! This is the 11th installment of the never-ending series of blog fodder known as the katdishionary. As I mentioned in my last installment, all previous katdishionary words are compiled for your convenience on the tab marked “katdishionary”. Um, except this one.

But I’ll get around to it eventually…

And now, on with the katdishionary:

emoticonaphobia (pronounced E-mo-ti-kon-a-fo-b-ah)

Definition: a condition stemming from my extreme reluctance to use any and all emoticons. Which is not to say I particularly mind anyone else use them (much). Use your words, people! There is one notable exception to this self-imposed rule however:

( I ) – Yes, that is a butt.

Origin: Oh, who knows? Blame it on my blatent non-conformity streak.

hectelegance (pronounced hekt-el-a-gance)

Definition:
1) a form of hectic elegance.
2) elegance at the speed of light, or getting the family dressed for church on Sunday.
3) elegance for the heck of it.

Origin: A twitter conversation which began when I asked @Brian_Russell how he would describe my blog (instead of “a wordpress blog”). His initial response was “hectic”, but he thought that sounded negative. Hence, the word “hectelegance”. At this point @gyoung9751 joined the conversation and added definitions 2 and 3. A first for the katdishionary. Congratulations, gentlemen. That’s lawsome.

HHPC human hair pincushion (pronounced H-H-P-C)

Definition: A pincushion stuffed with HUMAN HAIR.

Origin: My childhood. My mother is an excellent seamstress. According to her, stuffing a pincushion with human hair helps keep the pins and needles sharp. (What did I know? I was a mere toddler.) This particular pincushion has been in her posession since she made it back in the early 70s. Yes, people…she still has it. (The pieces are starting to come together, aren’t they?)

lazy book whore (pronounced la-zee-book-hoar)

Billy Coffey: not a lazy book whore

Definition: an author who writes one or two best selling books followed by several nominally crafted books which sell well because of his initial success.

Origin: While I first used the term “lazy book whore” here in the post Why I hate writing, Part 4, the term was originally coined by Billy Coffey in an email conversation.

mantastic (pronounced man-ta-stik)

Michael Perkins sports a mantastic winter beard

Definition: the state of being fantastically masculine.

Origin: Hmmm…I’m not sure when I started using that one. Probably around the time my friend Helen at Random Musings was lobbying for a pink honorary man card. (Incidentally, I’m pretty sure there’s no such thing as a pink man card. Honorary or otherwise.)

 rantpiling (pronounced rant-pi-ling)

Definition: the practice of writing and then saving blog posts where I rant incessantly about one thing or another. (I’ve gotta a lot of issues, people!)

Origin: Yet another conversation on the twitter wherein @kelybreez warned me against the practice of rantpiling, which he claimed causes high blood pressure and might possibly be communicable in some cases.

So there you have it folks. Yet another ridiculous entry into the never-ending blog fodder known as the katdishionary.

Sorry/you’re welcome!

Ah, yes gentle reader. It is once again time for another installment of the epic and never-ending series of blog fodder known as the katdishionary. For your convenience, I have combined all previous posts in one place. (See the katdishionary tab) If there are other words you have observed me using that have yet to make it into the katdishionary, please feel free to share them in the comments section of that page. And as always, sorry/you’re welcome.

And now, on with the katdishionary:

Awesome Cat – (pronounced: Ah-sum-kat)

Definition: Awesome Cat defies definition. He is awesome. The end.

Origin: My friend Shaun sent me the picture, which he found on Digg. As soon as I saw it, I knew Awesome Cat must be the unofficial mascot of the brain trust that is the Fellowship of the Traveling Smartypants.

Badgertastic – (pronounced ba-jer-ta-stik)

Definition: Very definitively and enthusiastically having to do with badgers.

Origin: Sleep Talkin’ Man Blog – a blog that chronicles the nocturnal ramblings of a seemingly mild manned English chap by day who tends to get a tad profane whist sleeping: “My badger’s gonna unleash hell on your ass. Badgertastic!” (Note: not suitable for all audiences.)

Example: Did you read SCL’s post about proposed VBS games? My favorite was Badger in a Bag. Badgertastic!

Badger in a Bag – (pronounced: ba-jer-in-a-bag)

Definition: A VBS game concept described as follows: “Let’s hide pieces of caramel in a bag and then put a really angry badger in the same bag. To win, you have to successfully grab a piece of candy from the bag without losing a finger.” ~ Jon Acuff

Origin: Stuff Christians Like Post #275 – Playing Red Rover at VBS

Example: To heck with our liability insurance! Let’s bring badger in a bag back to VBS this year!

Faction – (pronounced (fak-shun)

Definition: A memoir written by a relatively unknown and unpublished author with no ties to celebrities (in or out of rehab) which is rewritten as a novel in order to draw a larger audience.

Origin: Very savvy and smart publishers. (And no, I’m not being sarcastic. It’s brilliant marketing.)

Example: Snow Day by Billy Coffey. Available October 11, 2010 at bookstores everywhere. Buy one. Heck, buy 100. They make great stocking stuffers!

HRM – (pronounced: H-R-M)

Definition: Acronym for Helen of Random Musings. HRM is used to differentiate Helen when she interviews herself on her blog.

Origin: “I first thought of interviewing myself when Former Governor Blagojevich was causing a media circus by going on any show that would have him claiming that he shouldn’t be impeached because he hasn’t been convicted of a crime. (And that he is innocent, and Rahm Emmanuel should be subpoenaed to testify on his behalf at his impeachment hearing, blaj blaj blaj (sic)….) His antics were driving me crazy, and it occurred to me that by using a split personality as a literary device, I’d be able to demonstrate to people reading just how crazy. My friends liked the interviews and suggested I do them more often, so I have.” – Helen (aka HRM)

Examples:

Blagojevich Part I

Blagojevich Part II

How I Didn’t Become a Nun

Dancing With the Kumquats (My Supermarket Salsa Post)

About My Fortieth Birthday

My New Year’s Resolutions

Midyear New Year’s Resolution Update

Skunkalicious – (pronounced: skun-ka-li-shous)

Definition: The state of not wanting to leave the house due to an excess period between root touch ups which gives me the appearance of wearing an odoriferous rodent on my head.

Origin: Genetics. Asian DNA which causes premature graying. I started going gray in my late 20’s. Sadly, the math gene was not passed on to me.

Example: Sorry. I can’t meet you for lunch today. I’m feeling a bit skunkalicious.

This concludes this edition of the katdishionary. Always a pleasure to educate the internets.

Here we are at Katdishionary Part 7. Who knew I could stretch this series out into such a never-ending fountain of blog fodder? Well, I did, actually. Because I dig made up words. In case you missed the first six installments, you can find them here:

The Katdish Dictionary Part One
Katdishionary Part Two
Katdishionary Part Three
Katdishionary Part Four
Katdishionary Part Five
Katdishionary Part Six

And now, on with the Katdishionary:

As you know, I love the twitter! Oh sure, it abounds with annoying “social media experts” and spambots who try to ruin everyone else’s fun, but I don’t follow those types. I mostly only follow cool, real, live people who actually interact with one another. If I were one to make words beginning with “tw”, I would say it’s “twitterrific”! But I’m not. So I won’t. Anyway, today’s group of words are all from buddies on twitter. And by “buddies” I mean they are in my column labeled “Buddies”. Are you in this column? Don’t know do ya? Okay, if I talk to you on a regular basis, you are.

Skymalladocious (pronounced sky-mall-a-doe-shush)

Definition: A term used to describe one of my epic Sky Mall posts as being “docious”. I’m pretty sure that’s a good thing. Not exactly sure. Perhaps Mr. Young will comment and either confirm or deny this.

Origin: Glynn Young of Faith, Fiction and Friends used this term when tweeting my post,
Backyard Oasis courtesy of the Sky Mall, Part One. Incidentally, this was the first of three in the series. If you haven’t read them, you might want to check them out. They’re skymalladocious! Or so I’ve been told…

Katrant (pronounced kat-rant)

Definition: A term used to describe my state of mind when I rant incessantly. What makes me rant incessantly? Martha Stewart, rude anonymous comments, the girl scouts, Halloween costumes, collectibles, Petsmart, Christian retail, The Giving Tree, prosperity gospel, pajama-grams, Ricky Martin keychains, exploiting the homeless, pizza, and the prayer cross, just to name a few.

I have issues, people!

(Incidentally, if you care to read any of my incessant ranting posts, just search “incessant ranting”, because I’m not going to link all of them. I don’t have that kind of time.)

Origin: Heather from The Extraordinary Ordinary whist expressing her anticipation of the next rant, or “katrant” as she called it.

Connectinator (pronounced con-nek-ti-na-tor)

Definition: Someone who connects people or groups of people to new people or new groups of people. Sort of like a Connector as described in Malcom Gladwell’s book The Tipping Point, only more intense, obsessive and adorably annoying.

Origin: Stephanie Wetzel of The Red Clay Diaries juxtiposing my description of her as a “connector” on twitter. Here’s a play by play of the action:

AHEM >RT @brandonacox: Tell me one person, on Twitter, you consider a “connector.” (however you define that)

@redclaydiaries @katdish Thank u for the connector compliment! Of course if I’m a connector, then you’re the Connectinator.

So there you have it.

This concludes today’s installment of the Katdishionary. Although I do have a bonus acronym for those of who love a challenge. The first person who correctly identifies the following acronym may choose one of the following three options:

Option One: A guest post here on Hey Look a Chicken
Option Two: A guest post written by me for your blog
Option Three: None of the above. You can simply feel superior to everyone else as you bask in your cleverness.

And the mystery acronym of the day is…

IMGNAHS

The judges decisions are final. Please, no wagering, and Billy Coffey is not eligible. My blog. My rules.

Until next time, use your words. Even the made up ones. Especially those.

Yes, boys and girls, it’s time again for another installment of the never-ending fountain of blog fodder known as the Katdishionary! In case you missed the first five installments, you can find them here:

The Katdish Dictionary Part One
Katdishionary Part Two
Katdishionary Part Three
Katdishionary Part Four
Katdishionary Part Five

And now, on with the Katdishionary:

Internet Tornado (pronounced in-ter-net tore-na-doe)


image courtesy of photobucket.com

Definition: Okay, I’m gonna be honest here. I have no idea what an “Internet Tornado” is. But whatever it is, apparently, I’m one of them…

Origin: A guest post I wrote for my friend Peter Pollock, Does the Cost of the Gift Matter. Peter wrote a very kind introduction where he said: “Kathy Richards AKA Katdish is one of the most powerful internet tornado’s I have ever met.” So there you go…

TWSS (pronounced that’s what she said)

image courtesy of photobucket.com

Definition: (Deep, breathy sigh…) Seriously – I feel sort of silly including “TWSS” in the Katdishionary, but clearly it is necessary. The other day on the twitter, @coffeewithmarty asked @helenatrandom and @weightwhat, “What does TWSS mean?” (Actually, I believe he asked @HelenatRandom and @weightwatch, but I digress). To be fair, he knew all about “that’s what she said”, just not the acronym.

Origin: While the origins of TWSS are unknown, the saying regained popularity on one of the best shows on television today. I speak, of course, of The Office:

Unfollow Hammer (pronounced un-fol-o ham-mer)

image courtesy of photobucket.com

Definition: Laying down the unfollow hammer is the act of unfollowing someone without mercy on the twitter. Typically those whom you have followed that have not followed you back after several weeks. (The notable exception to this rule is @badbanana, who will not follow you, but is brilliant.) There are also people on twitter that will follow you for a courtesy refollow, then dump you 24 hours later. These people are (rhymes with “koosh tags”) and should have the unfollow hammer immediately slammed down upon them. You can find out when people unfollow you by signing up for NutshellMail.com (who should send me a nice fruit basket for referring all my friends to them).

Origin: My friend and sister in snark, Marni White. She completes me.

Nerdgasm (pronounced nerd-ga-zum)

Definition: when something extremely nerdy reaches epic proportions of excitement in a nerd’s brain (possibly inducing drool and fanboyism).

Origin: Brian Russell created this word and used it to describe his reaction to seeing the trailer for Tron: Legacy. He also wrote a Underfold comic about it, which I can’t find at he moment, but I’m sure he will link it in the comments section, won’t you Brian?

Editor’s Note: I would just like to point out that I am not a nerd, and I consider myself more of a freak than a geek. But for whatever reason, I seem to attract them like moths to a flame, in both the virtual and non-virtual worlds. I don’t know why.

***

This concludes another riveting installment of the Katdishionary. Sorry/you’re welcome.

Yeah…that’s right – PART FIVE. I told you this was never ending…

In case you missed the first four installments, you may find them here:

The Katdish Dictionary Part One
Katdishionary Part Two
Katdishionary Part Three
Katdishionary Part Four

And now, on with the katdishionary:

In the first four installments of the katdishionary, I have shared words and terms from my time on the internets. However, there are some terms that have their origins in the non-virtual world. I will share a few with you here.

You’re not the boss of me – (pronounced Yur-not-the-boss-ov-mee)

Definition: A declarative phrase meaning “you’re not the boss of me”.

Origin: Two summers ago. My friends Jeff and Tamara had bought a house. Jeff was already here, but Tam and the girls were still living in Ohio. As a surprise housewarming gift for their daughters, they had picked out new bedding and I was painting their rooms to coordinate:

Some of you may think I’m not much of a follower, but that’s not necessarily true. I can and do follow strong leadership. Jeff is my pastor and I’m part of a church plant. I defer to Jeff and others when it comes to areas that are not my area of expertise. However…in this particular scenario (the painting of their house), I may have gotten a tad bit demanding and forceful in my opinions of how certain things should be handled, and I may have been insistent that certain things be done my way.

To which Jeff response was, “You’re not the boss of me.”

And then I don’t remember what happened after that because I was laughing too hard.

Hard Panda – (pronounced hard-pan-da)

Definition: A panda that isn’t fuzzy or hairy, with short, smooth fur.

Origin: We left the kids with my mom for a few days to attend the Exponential Conference in Orlando, Florida. The conference was over by Thursday, so we planned on going to Disney World the following day. When I asked the kids what sort of souvenir they wanted from our trip, my then 6 year old daughter informed me all she wanted was a “hard panda”. After some considerable explanation, I was able to disseminate the difference between a hard panda and a fuzzy panda. Also, “hard panda” was to go-to phrase for the week in Orlando.

“Fuzzy Panda”

Honky for you (pronounced hon-kee 4 u)

Definition: interchangeable song lyrics to the worship song Fuel.

Origin: My daughter. Who sometimes prefers her lyrics to the actual lyrics:

We are burning…
We are yearning…
We are longing… We are honky
Longing for You Honky for you.

See also Go on up to the mountain of mercy Percy,

and

He rose and conquered the grave,
Jesus conquered the grave
Heroes and konk-konk the brave,
Heroes konk-konk the brave

***

And thus concludes another edition of the katdishionary. Sorry/you’re welcome!

It’s time for yet another installment in this never ending flowing fountain of blog fodder known as Katdishionary, where I attempt to explain the origins of made up words found here and other places I frequent around the internets.

In case you missed the first three installments, you may find them here:

The Katdish Dictionary Part One
Katdishionary Part Two
Katdishionary Part Three

And now, on with the katdishionary:

Jesus Frying Pan – (pronounced Geez-sus Fri-ing Pan)

Definition: A frying pan with an image of Jesus on it.

Origin: A Gift to Remember by Candy Steele, from the Fellowship of the Traveling Smartypants Blog. (What – you don’t follow that blog? For shame…)

“We have a wedding coming up in the family, which brings us to that endeared tradition of registering for gifts that most people can’t afford to buy for couples they barely know. So in light of the fact that I need to re-register (can’t you do that after 35 years?) and my pots and pans have seen better days (read: my family has eaten all the non-stick coating and are all going to die), I want to be gifted this pan. It doesn’t matter that I’m not the one getting married. It would make the holiest of food. Children would never misbehave at the table if Jesus was embedded in their French Toast now, would they?

And whackin’ somebody up the side of the head with it would seem so fruitful.”

HTITHWAJFP – (Pronounced H-T-I-T-H-W-A-J-F-P)

Definition: Acronym for “Hit them in the head with a Jesus Frying Pan”.

Origin: Wuddup with the Side-Ways Smiley Face? Comments Section

Nick the Geek said: “I amaze my youth when I text or message them and use much more advanced terms than the simple LOL. :oD That said, when I here someone use lolspeak IRL I want to HTITHWAJFP (Hit the in the head with a Jesus Frying Pan). >:o “

Skanktinicity (Pronounced skank-ta-ne-sa-tee)

Origin: Wuddup with the Side-Ways Smiley Face?

Definition: A state of mind brought on by too many Bratz Dolls in the house.

Usage: “So, apparently I’m in a bit of a non-conformity/skanktinicity groove lately. I’ll shake the skanky thing as soon as I get the rest of those Bratz dolls out of my house. BTW – If you don’t want me to send the leftover dolls and feet to our good friend Beth, you should probably take a bullet for her and enter the contest. I think I’ve gotten her pretty worked up about that — mostly because she knows I’ll do it without blinking an eye.”

(See also Skanktacular)

IANL (Pronounced I-A-N-L)

Definition: Acronym for “I am not laughing”.

Origin: Wuddup with the Side-Ways Smiley Face? Comments Section:

Beth said: However, I am not laughing. (IANL) If those dolls show up at my house….Worked up does not begin to describe it. >:-$

Editor’s Note: Beth had recently been the recipient of a “Sox in the Box” laundry sorter from yours truly. I also sent (at no charge to her) a slightly used giant-headed, spinning and singing Dora the Explorer Mermaid Doll. She wasn’t as thrilled as you might imagine she would be…

OSLT (Pronounced O-S-L-T)

Definition: Acronym for “Or something like that”. (Although I had no clue what it meant until alert twitterer @elysa googled it for me yesterday. Thanks @elysa!

Origin: Wuddup with the Side-Ways Smiley Face? Comments Section:

Candy said: You know you have become “one of them” when you SAY “LOL” in conversation. OMG. C’mon, Kat, get with the 80’s! I started using abbreviations back in my PC Jr days. (That would have been BEFORE NtG was born). The reason was so my kids wouldn’t know what I was saying. What goes around, comes around. OSLT.

Helen said: Candy, what does OSLT mean? I am reading it phonetically and I don’t like it one bit! 😉

Katdish said: Helen – I think Candy just called you a slut. I could be wrong…

***

This concludes this edition of the katdishionary. I will most likely revisit the referenced post again, because it is awash in katdishionary terms.

Are you wondering what we all did before the Twitter? No…didn’t think so.

Sorry/you’re welcome!

Ah yes, fair readers. It’s time for yet another installment in this never ending flowing fountain of blog fodder known as Katdishionary, where I attempt to explain the origins of made up words found here and other places I frequent around the internets.

In case you missed the first two installments, you may find them here:

The Katdish Dictionary Part One

Katdishionary Part Two

And now, on with the katdishionary:

Getcherfreakon – (pronounced get-cher-freak-on)

Definition: Alternative title for a post in which I was supposed to described 7 weird things about myself.

Origin: Getcherfreakon : Here is a brief (or not) excerpt from the original post:

My buddy Steph at The Red Clay Diaries tagged me to write seven weird things about myself. Seriously, it would be more of a challenge to write seven things that were normal about me, but whatever. So, I thought I’d throw in some things that would you might find surprising about me, because I’m fairly sure you’re down with the fact that I’m pretty weird. Well, here goes:

1) Since some of my blogger friends kept commenting on my blog, thereby distracting me from writing this post (I’m ignoring you Steph, by the way), by the time I was ready to write this, all the clever titles had been taken. So I was originally going to call this blog post “HOT MONKEY SEX“. But then I thought about what kind of traffic a title like that might bring in, and how bitterly disappointed they would be, and thought better of it.

Lawsome – (law-some)

Definition: A combination of the words lame and awesome, meaning both equally lame and awesome.

Origin: Used to describe my friend Angela of Vanities of Vanities who is lawsome because she disagrees with me sometimes and gets all pretend indignant with me. Lawsome.

Man Candy – (pronounced man-can-dee)

Definition: a term used to describe my using Monday’s guest blogger Billy Coffey to attract a wider female audience. (Which, BTW, it totally did.)

Origin: The comments section of Billy’s intro to this blog, Answer: An Increase in Female Readership where Wendy from Weight What made the following comment:

Using Billy as man-candy? Shame on you! Now do it some more.

(See also mantastic)

Snort (pronounced snort!)

Definition: The representation of laughter in written form. Although, truth be told I don’t actually “snort” when I laugh. I either belt out a rather loud “bah ha ha” or snicker like Muttley, Dick Dastardly’s sidekick in those old Hanna Barbera cartoons.

Origin: Oh, heck. It’s late. I can’t remember…

***

This concludes this portion of the Katdishionary. Stayed tuned for more installments soon. And as always, Sorry/you’re welcome.

**Read this really fast in your head:
Katdishionary is the intellectual property of Steph at the Red Clay Diaries (hereinafter referred to as SOTRCD). Reference herein to any specific commercial product, process, service by trade name, trademark, manufacturer, or otherwise, does not constitute or imply its endorsement, recommendation, or favoring by SOTRCD or any entities thereof. The views and opinions of the originators expressed therein do not necessarily state or reflect those of the HLAC, SOTRCD, FOTTSP, TWSS or any agency or entities thereof.

Katdishionary – (pronounced ka-di-shun-ary)

Definition: A collection of made up words providing endless blog fodder.

Origin: comment from Steph at the Red Clay Diaries from the first installment of this never-ending series:

“I have to share a brainstorm that came to me in the car, on my way to Starbucks.

The Katdish Dictionary is a nice name for the service you’re providing. But a better name would be:

THE KATDISHIONARY.

You can pay me my standard branding fee later.”

(see also badgertastic)

Fatassitosis – (pronounced fat-as-si-to-sis)

Definition: A mutant strain of a virus scientists claim to have recently discovered. Their findings state that obesity can be “caught” as easily as a common cold from other people’s coughs, sneezes and dirty hands. The condition has been linked to a highly-infectious virus which causes sniffles and sore throats.

Origin: HLAC’s breaking news story – This just in: I’m not fat, I just have a butt cold!

Kadonkadonk (pronounced ka-don-ka-donk)

Definition: what Sherri’s butt says when she walks.

Origin: (see Fatassitosis)

Example: Sherri said: I’ve been a cold sufferer for years now.

Big AL calls mine the “mystery butt”. No one has seen it in years!!!!

Badonkadonk – (pronounced ba-don-ka-donk)

Definition: What Steph’s butt says when she walks.

Origin: (see also fatassitosis)

Example: Steph says: ANOTHER way we are alike. Only my butt says badonkadonk. My sister and I could both weigh next-to-nothing and still have lots of cushioning. My sister was once told by an African-American girl that her butt was awfully big for a white person’s.

Italian blood here too.

( ) ( ) ( )

Hmmm…That’s a considerable word count for a post about big butts. Kewl.

And now, let’s sing, shall we?