I have heard myself described as outspoken. I will definitely agree with that assessment to a certain degree. But I also believe you can be outspoken without being a loud mouthed jerk, and hopefully I’m able to pull that off most of the time.
Believe it or not, despite my tendency towards sarcasm and outright snarkiness, there’s not much that hurts me more than knowing I’ve hurt someone else, even if it is unintentional.
Such was the case last week. I won’t go into specifics. Basically what happened is a friend sent me a link via twitter, I went to the site she linked and then immediately sent a very snarky tweet back to the friend who sent it to me. It was meant completely in jest, but had I exercised some self-control and put myself in the other person’s shoes, I would have realized how incredibly rude and insensitive I had been. The worst part? I didn’t realize I had hurt her feelings until I read a tweet she sent to another friend about it hours later.
What I wanted to do is find a dark hole, crawl inside and hide. What I did instead was send my friend several DM apologizing for being such a calloused jerk, to which she gracefully responded that she was being oversensitive. All the while this conversation is going on, I was also having a DM conversation with my other friend who was assuring me that everyone makes mistakes, and that I shouldn’t be so hard on myself. (This friend puts the “awe” in awesome, and I am so blessed to have her as a friend. There I was telling her what a jerk I was, and she’s trying to make me feel better.)
I’m going to be honest. This still bothers me. It still makes me cringe. Not because my friend hasn’t forgiven me, because she told me she has and I believe her.
It bothers me because I realize that the cruelty and insensitivity I despise so much in others is within me as well.
It’s a painful reminder of what a wretch I truly am, and just much I am in need of a Savior.
NOTE: This is not one of those posts where I tell you all how wretched I am in the hopes you will tell me that I’m not. I’m not looking for vindication or praise. I’m just trying to write honestly.
It began two years ago with a simple conversation between one college softball player and one groundskeeper. I’m not sure who first said what. All I know is at some point one said something about being a much better ballplayer than the other, which was taken as an insult, which resulted in more insults, which resulted in the first ever softball game between the girls fastpitch team and the staff.
Last Wednesday was round three.
The games are always interesting. There is an extraordinary amount of fanfare involved, all of which can be boiled down to one word—pride. That’s what fuels these games. It’s not just pros against Joes, it’s the experience of age versus the cockiness of youth. Both teams are out to prove something, whether it be that that a bunch of old men can still kick it up a notch when needed or that the gals can hit and throw and run just as good—better, even—than the guys.
So while there is plenty in the way of friendly trash talking, there is also an undeniable seriousness beneath. My team doesn’t want to be beaten by a bunch of girls. Their team doesn’t want to be beaten by a bunch of groundskeepers, a few office workers, and a mailman.
It was an informal affair at best—no uniforms, no signals, and no stolen bases. And no umpire. Balls and strikes were called by the catchers, one of whom our team borrowed from the other. Baserunners were called safe or out based on consensus.
What could go wrong?
As it turned out, not much. For a while.
Because despite the combination of weakened knees and livers and lungs, us old guys were holding our own. And the young gals were holding theirs, despite the fact they’d been up for days cramming for finals. We were locked in a 1-0 pitchers duel.
But then through a series of walks and hits, we rednecks managed to load the bases with two outs.
Things were suddenly serious, and very much so. The chatter and clapping began in our dugout, while in the field the ladies were pounding their gloves and getting restless. And nervous.
The count ran full, and I could see the sweat building on the pitcher’s face. The intensity was getting to her. It was a look I’d seen before. No way she’d throw a strike.
And she didn’t. The ball sailed about four inches outside.
I jogged to third as the carousel of baserunners moved up one base. The runner ahead of me stomped on home plate with authority. We had a tie game.
Yes! Wait. No.
Because then the pitcher decided her last pitch was a strike after all, which was immediately agreed upon by her teammates.
Team Redneck protested in a most vehement way, of course. But in the end, there wasn’t much we could do about it. We took the field and vowed revenge our next at bat. Which never came, because after they batted they decided the game was over.
I didn’t stick around for the cookout afterwards. I imagine it was a quiet meal. Me, I didn’t care that much. It was a chance for me to play some ball. The score was irrelevant. And I guarantee you that thought was echoed by most of the people on my team who just enjoyed playing like kids again. It didn’t bother us that we lost. What bothered us was how we lost.
We played by the rules. They didn’t.
You could see this whole episode as something bad. Not me. In fact, I see much good in it.
It lets me know that regardless of how often we’re reminded of how bad both the world and the people in it are, we still expect folks to follow the rules. To play fair. Most do. A lot don’t, of course, and never will. But as long as there is someone somewhere willing to take offense when the rules are broken, I really think we’ll be okay.
All of this has gotten me thinking about the rules my Dad first taught me about baseball. The ones I’m teaching my son now:
Play hard.
Practice much.
Don’t be afraid to get dirty.
Have fun.
Cheer for your teammates.
Keep your head up.
Win well. Lose better.
Shake hands when you’re done.
I like those rules. They’re good for baseball.
They’re good for life, too.
***
To read more from Billy Coffey, visit him at at his website and follow him on the twitter at @billycoffey.
“God called unto him and he said, Here am I” Exodus 3:4
When God speaks, many of us are like men in a fog, we give no answer. Moses’ reply revealed that he was somewhere. Readiness means a right relationship to God and a knowledge of where we are at present. We are so busy telling God where we would like to go. The man or woman who is ready for God and His work is the one who carries off the prize when the summons comes. We wait with the idea of some great opportunity, something sensational, and when it comes we are quick to cry – “Here am I.” Whenever Jesus Christ is in the ascendant, we are there, but we are not ready for an obscure duty.
Readiness for God means that we are ready to do the tiniest little thing or the great big thing, it makes no difference. We have no choice in what we want to do, whatever God’s programme may be we are there, ready. When any duty presents itself we hear God’s voice as Our Lord heard His Father’s voice, and we are ready for it with all the alertness of our love for Him. Jesus Christ expects to do with us as His Father did with Him. He can put us where He likes, in pleasant duties or in mean duties, because the union is that of the Father and Himself. “That they may be one, even as We are one.”
Be ready for the sudden surprise visits of God. A ready person never needs to get ready. Think of the time we waste trying to get ready when God has called! The burning bush is a symbol of everything that surrounds the ready soul, it is ablaze with the presence of God.
You know what? I’ve been followed and unfollowed more in the past week than I ever have. I use Mr. Tweet sometimes to find people to follow. I highly recommend it. I’ve found some really great folks to follow using it. But an unfortunate side effect of following new folks is that the “social media marketing experts” find you, follow you hoping for a courtesy refollow, and then unceremoniously dump you after you don’t refollow them after 24 hours. Because they could care less about you. They’re just artificially increasing their own followings so they can call themselves “social media experts”. To be fair, there actually are a few folks who know what they’re doing, but they typically don’t seek you out first. What a joke. Whateva, end of mini rant.
In other news, I got a sweet deal on a Season 2 DVD set of 24, and I watched an atrocious amount of television this week. Speaking of which, there is a video in this post that is a bit on the violent side. Fair warning.
And now the best of me (or not) on the twitter this week:
RT @stretchmarkmama: Brought home a Where’s Waldo book from the library with every Waldo circled in marker. Jackpot!
RT @muchl8r: Our job isn’t to make ourselves into someone but rather to find out who we were made to be then become that person:)
@weightwhat Actually, I think Sasquatch is agnostic. #tweetsthatmakenosenseunlessyoureadmyblog
@chuckallen CLOWN MIMES??? Sweet Fancy Moses! (in reply to chuckallen RT @katdish: @bryanallain And clowns, mimes, and blue man group. // I once danced with clown mimes at a zoo. That was pretty scary.)
@HeatherSunseri Wow. That must have been horrible. (in reply to HeatherSunseri @katdish Believe it or not, I got trapped in St. Croix b/c of volcanic ash on the runways.I was forced to remain in tropics for extra day)
@marni71 Morning! He’s stuck in Paris because of volcano. I know, right? (in reply to marni71 @redclaydiaries @katdish @sarahmsalter Good morning ladies. So what’s up with @charliewetzel and his travels?)
@redclaydiaries Would you like me to DM @charliewetzel my Sky Mall posts? It’s no problem, really… (in reply to redclaydiaries @sarahmsalter He’s staying in a local hotel overnight. Booked to fly in AM. IF airspace is open by then.)
@noveldoctor Morning Sunshine! (in reply to noveldoctor @katdish [Mumbles coined word that combines benign greeting with mild expletive. Puts on sunglasses. Shuffles out of room.]
@noveldoctor HIYA STEVE!!!!!! HOW ARE YOU THIS MORNING! (in reply to noveldoctor It is a great kindness when morning people scale back their perkiness upon greeting non-morning people.)
@bryanallain And clowns, mimes, and blue man group. (in reply to bryanallain The only thing we have to fear is fear itself…and robots cross-breeding with wolverines.)
If loving the movie Zombieland is wrong, I don’t wanna be right.
My first car was a 1978 Ford Fairmont Futura piece of crap that I paid for myself. With no AC. In Houston.
The high school is right next to the junior high. Since when does a 16 year old need to drive a Lexus or an Escalade?
Wait, I’m not finished complaining yet…
Well, my son missed the bus this morning & I had to wait in the car line at the junior high. That sucked.
Goodnight @herbiegookins, wherever you are!
We’ll cover zombies on Friday. Did you know Woody Harrelson’s father died in prison? #random&uselessinformation
@NEgraceful He was a handsome beast wasn’t he? (in reply to NEgraceful @katdish Intrigued…and still thinking about the giraffe from the last SkyMall post.)
@CassandraFrear Thanks. I love Sky Mall. Endless blog fodder. (in reply to CassandraFrear @katdish Can’t wait to read it ! Your last “gardening” post was amazing! It’ll be my first cup of coffee for sure.)
@VariantVal It’s a natural progression, don’t you think? (in reply to VariantVal @katdish you’re growing horns?)
Sorry I’ve been so scarce today. And now I’m fixin’ to be scarce again. Off to horn lessons!
Alrighty. I’m pretty exhausted from watching TV for the past 4 hours. (Wow, that’s just sad) Goodnight
My 2 part Sky Mall backyard series has now been expanded to a 3 part. I know. You’re welcome.
And I gotta tell ya, I’m pretty heartbroken.
All of the “social media experts” that followed me in droves are now unfollowing me because I didn’t courtesy refollow.
@VariantVal Okay, dirty how? Ewh… (in reply to VariantVal @katdish He said he didn’t want to get them dirty so LMAO)
@VariantVal WHY DIDN’T HE HAVE PANTS ON?
@elaina_avalos I talk about a lot of things most people just keep to themselves (in reply to elaina_avalos @katdish I don’t know. I don’t think I’ve ever heard anyone talk about that. Haha. Maybe the Dog Whisperer knows?)
@Helenatrandom Yeah…I’m a legend in my own mind. (in reply to Helenatrandom @katdish Don’t they know who he is? The dog of a famous blogger and twitterer deserves more respect!)
@Helenatrandom Buddy Lane, is in my ears and in my eyes. There beneath the blue suburban skies… (in reply to Helenatrandom @katdish Why, I think your dog walking route should be renamed “Buddy Love Lane” …)
RT @noveldoctor: “Romantic idealist” is just a nicer way of saying “single and alone.”
@Helenatrandom There would be a lot of bronzed mailboxes here if everyone felt that way. (in reply to Helenatrandom @katdish But of course! I know I would have my mailbox BRONZED if @buddylovethedog phantom peed on it! BRONZED!)
@Helenatrandom they dig it the most. (in reply to Helenatrandom @katdish Awww… I bet the neighbors find that SO adorable…)
Patiently walking @buddylovethedog as he phantom pees on everyone’s mailbox.
@jennybekrocks Yeah. I think I just threw up in my mouth a little. (in reply to jennybekrocks @katdish And cold sores. I’m going to stop now. I’m grossing myself out.)
@jennybekrocks That’s so true. Lice works like that, too. (in reply to jennybekrocks @beckfromfrogandtoad @katdish everyone knows you can’t get rid of illness until you share it … 😉
RT @amysorrells: @katdish My “sketching out” process is top-secret. I could tell you, but then . . . I’d have to write it. LOL
@amysorrells Mmm hmmm. Define “sketching out (in reply to amysorrells @katdish I’m sketching out a second (or third) one, depending on how you count ’em! Really!)
@amysorrells Okay, fine. How’s the MS coming along then? Are you writing? Hmmm????? (in reply to amysorrells @katdish I’m so not a blogcrastinator. SO not.)
In carpool line. Just noticed my right rear tire is low. Rethinking the “drive your daughter to school in your pjs” thing.
Jack Bauer – You had me at “I’m gonna need a hacksaw”.
RT @noveldoctor: If you have the gift of writing and yet don’t write, you’re the author of a tragedy.
@CandySteele that cat looks like he’s praising Jesus. Amen. (in reply to CandySteele @katdish I found this when I went to DC and thought of you. Looks like awesome cat on crack http://is.gd/bq0tG
@MrTweet_Alert Also? @redclaydiaries called me annoying
@MrTweet_Alert Mr. Tweet. You are very helpful albeit very bossy… (in reply to MrTweet_Alert @katdish – redclaydiaries recommended you to @MrTweet. You should acknowledge it here: http://bit.ly/97qgI9)
Man, it’s 1PM already. I need a sammich
@pwilson re: today’s post. Check out this flag made of baseballs. Awesome. http://twitpic.com/1f2sd7
@weightwhat Happy Birthday Princess!
For the record, I typically only refollow real people, not bots.
Oh-em-Gee! I check my email and suddenly I’m being followed by a gaIllion Internet marketing “gurus”. Wuddup with that?
I’m married. I don’t need the “easily meet in many dating”.
The easily meet in the many dating is here! I’ll get even made a cute girl in your area, so many people register for girls! (Translated)
Um, okay. Now I don’t feel bad for deleting the comment. Thanks for your help @elaina_avalos
I suppose I could send the comment to my mom and ask her what it means, but that would require my mom have working knowledge of a computer.
But what if this person is really trying to leave a comment, and is getting increasingly angry at me for not publishing it?
So…Every single day, I get a comment on one particular post, but it’s written in Japanese. I figure it’s spam, so I delete it…
We actually DID have potatoes after all! You’re welcome. http://twitpic.com/1ep094
@maggiedammit That’s really the only explanation for the McRib (McKnuckle) sandwich. (in reply to maggiedammit I am 100% convinced McDonald’s food contains a mind erasing drug so you forget how gross it is until the next time.)
@duane_scott You are wise beyond your years young man. (in reply to duane_scott @katdish remind me not to hang out with you ever… I value my life still.)
@duane_scott Some things are nature, not nurture. Samurai blood and all…(in reply to duane_scott What are you teaching your kids anyway?!)
Kids say the darndest things don’t they? http://twitpic.com/1el9ty
If you’ve been following along at home, I’ve been trying to decide on a new yardscape as a housewarming gift for all my new neighbors courtesy of a development company ripping out the lovely pasture behind our house and replacing it with a subdivision of 170 houses. In case you missed the first two options, you may can find them here:
I think it was Winston Churchill who said, “Go big or go home.” Okay, maybe it wasn’t Churchill, but I think he gives the quote a bit more weight, don’t you?
To round out my Sky Mall backyard oasis series, I would like to present for your consideration the biggest and most well thought out (?) vignette yet. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you…
Zombieland!
For those of you unfamiliar with this modern day classic, I have provided this trailer:
For a realistic oasis, I had to go outside the confines of the Sky Mall catalog, but let’s begin with what I found there, shall we? (Say yes.)
Zombie of Montclaire Moores Statue 3 at $89.95 each Not for the faint of heart, this gray-toned Zombie of Montclaire Moors statue features the most zombie-like eyes you’ve ever seen. Captured in meticulous detail in quality designer resin, this zombie garden statue brings the flesh-hungry undead to your daffodil bed!
They’re certainly the most zombie-like eyes I’ve ever seen! I think at least three, don’t you think?
The Dweller Below – Large $89.95
Growing up afraid of things that “go bump in the night,” British artist Manchester gives form to the legendary boogeyman said to roam below the streets of London!
Okay, not necessarily a zombie, but good enough for me! That’s really all I could find from the Sky Mall, but a few zombie statues does not a vignette make.
Miscellaneous garden tools and shotguns (free – We’ve got plenty!) (Woody Harrelson sold separately)
Hostess delivery truck, estimated blue book value $12,000* *Okay, I just pulled that figure out of my head. I have no idea how much a Hostess truck costs. But isn’t it fabulous? Since the truck was featured early on in the movie, I was thinking of using it as sort of a “gateway to Zombieland”, perhaps with some pink carnations spilling out of the back to represent the much hated snowball treats scoffed at by Tallahassee.
Black Cadillac Escalade EBay $36,000
Tallahassee’s first vehicle in the movie.
Yellow Hummer EBay $29,995
I think both vehicles are necessary to make the kind of statement we’re going for, don’t you agree?
And finally, what I hope will be the focal point of this beautiful Zombieland Garden Oasis,
Ferris Wheel EBay $59,000 obo
Who can forget that final scene? I think this Ferris wheel is the perfect representation of all the valuable lessons learned in this movie.
Grand total for the Zombieland Garden Paradise: $137,354.80
I realize this particular scenario is a bit of a budget buster, but the grand total is roughly 1/3 of what the lowest price home in this new subdivision will cost. I think my new neighbors are worth it. Don’t you?
So there you have it. All three options. Me and my credit card anxiously await your final decision.
But here’s a brief recap: The acreage behind my house will soon be turned into a 170 home subdivision, and since our yard is not much to look at (unless you like wide open spaces), I thought I would treat our new neighbors with a visual delight with some help from our friends at the Sky Mall. Option 1 was African Safari Oasis.
If you’ve read this blog before, than I’m sure you’re aware that I am a Christian. But I thought to myself, do I have the right to publicly proclaim my faith to those who don’t share my belief system? I don’t recall reading anywhere in the Bible that I should be doing this. (Oh wait…maybe I did…But I digress…)
The Houston area is vastly diverse, with all cultures living in harmony. Why not have a backyard oasis to reflect this fact? Ladies and gentlemen, I submit for your approval Option 2,
The Garden Oasis of Tolerance and Diversity:
I thought I would start with a few Greek gods scattered about the property. Sadly, Zeus is not available, but this guy is:
Poseidon: God of the Sea $350.00 The muscular god of the sea holds his famed trident and stands astride his symbolic triple dolphin in our exclusive, grand-scale sculpt. This Italian-inspired, 18th-century replica exudes the power attributed to one of the fabled gods of mythology.
We don’t have a pool as pictured, but sometimes we get some puddles after a heavy rain.
Goddess Aurora Statue (Estate) $450.00 Balancing atop her grand plinth, our statue is based on a classic 19th-century sculpture of the goddess Aurora that once crowned an elegant garden fountain.
“Hebe, the Goddess of Youth” Statue $395.00 Artist Bertel Thorvaldsen truly captured the eternal beauty of youth with his sculptural likeness of Hebe, cupbearer of the Greek gods. (She’s probably fun at keggers, too.)
And speaking of ancient civilizations, I thought it would be a good idea to have my Asian ancestors represent:
The Enlightened Buddha Statue $135.00
Floating on a stylized lotus, this nearly 3 1/2-foot-tall Buddha sculpture arrives like a refreshing breeze with his calm countenance and endless serenity.
Who among you couldn’t use some endless serenity? I’d be all up in that. But some prefer a happier, jollier Buddha, so I thought I throw this guy in, too:
Jolly Hotei Buddha Statue $115.00 What better friend to have than one who changes all the sorrows of the world into happiness? It is tradition to rub the belly of over two-foot-tall Asian work of art for joy, his ear lobes for wisdom, and the gold in his hands for wealth.
Then I figured, if one jolly fat guy makes you smile, the more the merrier:
“Basho the Sumo Wrestler” Sculpture $95.00 Basho crouches in his mawashi (Sumo belt) in these intricate sculpts with wide stances.
I’m gonna be honest. My Japanese is a little rusty, but I’m pretty sure “Basho” loosely translates into “Tons of Fun”.
“Easter Island Moai Monolith” Statues $98.95 Inspired by the 380 A.D. originals
Assumed to be depictions of local chiefs, heroes or gods, the giant statues on Easter Island are some of the world’s most intriguing archaeological artifacts.
I’m not exactly sure anyone still worships these giant heads, but I’ve always been a fan of the unibrow.
Rhiannon the Archer Fairy $295.00 In a classic sculptural pose, our traditional work of European garden art depicts a beautiful archer drawing back to let her arrow fly.
What’s that you say? People don’t worship fairies? You’ve obviously never been to the Renaissance Festival…
And just because I wanted to add a little mystery and whimsy to the vignette, you know him, you love him:
“Bigfoot, the Garden Yeti” Statue $98.95 With alleged Bigfoot sightings the world over, from the Himalayas to the Americas, this elusive, mythical legend has been captured for Toscano in a quality designer resin statue and hand-painted for startling realism.
Startling realism? Did Sasquatch pose for this statue? Hmmm….
This brings today’s Garden Oasis Option grand total of $2,032.90. But seriously, can you put a price on tolerance and diversity? Me thinks not…
Tomorrow I will conclude this series with one final option. I know…you’re welcome.
Today’s guest post is from pastor, blogger and encourager Kevin Martineau. Lest you think pastors have it all together, he’s here to tell you that that’s not the case.
Have you ever struggled with pretending to be someone that you are not or struggled with being what other people think you should be? I have.
For many years, I thought I had to have everything together as a pastor. I thought that all conflict was bad and it needed to be avoided at all costs. I thought that people wanted me to put on my big fake Christian smile and suck it up and pretend that nothing was wrong.
The problem was: SOMETHING was wrong! I was hurting. I was confused. I was anxious. I was stuffing my emotions and my passions. The result was a 3 month medical leave (or forced Sabbatical as I call it now).
During that time off (with the help of many skilled counsellors and much pain) I began to realize how much I had not been living out my true self – the me that God wanted me to be! I hadn’t been living out my passions because of fear and I wasn’t being true to myself, my family and the people that I had the privilege of leading.
This has been a 3 year journey now (and I am sure it is going to be a lifelong journey). I wish that I could say that I have it all together now but I don’t. I still struggle with some of these issues. Thankfully God continues to lead me forward on this journey and recently He brought a great book into my life to further help me. The book is The me I want to be by John Ortberg (who happens to be one of my favourite authors. I have read ALL of his books.)
I am only two chapters into the book and my world is already being rocked. Today, I read this chapter: “The Me I Don’t Want to Be.” In this chapter Ortberg challenges us to come to grips with the rivals that stop us from becoming the person that God wants us to be. They are:
The me I pretend to be. The me I think I should be. The me other people want me to be. The me I am afraid God wants. The me that fails to be.
This chapter really hit home for me because of all that I have already mentioned. I recognize that I need to do some more evaluation again. I need to drop the “masks” that have come up again and be the person that God wants me to be! I don’t want to go to back to being the me that I don’t want to be!
“Spiritual greatness has nothing to do with being greater than others. It has everything to do with being as great as each of us can be.” Henri Nouwen
Do you struggle to be the person that God wants you to be? What rival stops you the most?
I consider the neighborhood where I live to be ideal. Let me rephrase that. I used to consider the neighborhood where I live to be ideal. It’s close to everything, but once you drive back here, it’s like you’re living in the country. The lots are an acre or more, there are no sidewalks or streetlights and the neighbors are neighborly. Best of all, the back of our lot backed up to some woods and a field of cattle. I remember sitting on the back porch at night and hearing coyotes and all manner of wildlife. That may not sound appealing to some, but I liked it.
Since we built here several years ago, the woods have been replaced by a subdivision, but until recently we still had our cattle neighbors. Now it seems a developer has made the owner of the adjacent property a offer too good to refuse. Soon the field behind me will be replaced with 170 homes. I’m not thrilled about it, but since I want to be neighborly, I got the idea of fixing up our rather boring backyard into a bit of an oasis for the new neighbors for enjoy. I know…I’m a giver. Here’s what our back yard currently looks like:
Not exactly visually appealing. Oh, sure the blue pressure tank and the 55 gallon drum we use to burn trash are lovely, just not “fancy”. I want to give our new neighbors some fancy. And I need your help.
My good friends at the Sky Mall have a plethora of fantastical yard art just waiting to put me in unrecoverable debt. The problem is, there’s so much to choose from! This is where you come in. Please give my your opinion which theme you think best suits my back yard:
Option 1: African Safari
That’s a pretty sizable backyard, and the summers here are what I like to call “Africa hot”. This option makes sense in so many ways.
Zairen the Zebra Sculpture $235.00 This exceptional work of art lends a touch of exotic flair to even the most domestic setting!…Imagine your guests’ expressions at spying this meticulously hand-painted, bold black-and-white Toscano exclusive in a flowerbed or along a garden path!
“Kalahari” Meerkat Statues $19.95 to $34.95 (not sure whether the butt or the head is more expensive)
We’ve little doubt why meerkats recently became beloved screen stars–they’re adorable! Our spirited sculptures busily climb “in through the out door” in this imaginative Design Toscano exclusive, two-part sculpt cast in quality designer resin and hand-painted in realistic tones for your home and garden.
“Lioness of Namibia” Statue by artist Samuel Lightfoot $125.00 Transform your home or garden into an exotic paradise with our regal lioness…Lightfoot’s big cat sculpture will securely stretch languidly atop your mantel, garden wall or outdoor tree branch (I’m a big fan of languid security.)
“Mombasa, the Garden Giraffe” $995.00 At almost 8 feet tall, it’s the largest garden sculpture we’ve ever offered! If you really want your garden to be noticed, Mombasa, our almost 8-foot-tall designer resin giraffe, is sized to impress! Since there’s no hiding this realistically hand-painted, exclusive sculpture, even amidst your tall trees and hedges, your neighbors are sure to be surprised when Mombasa moves in next door. For ornamental use only. (As opposed to what?
There you have it. Option One for a grand total of $1,409.90 (plus shipping and handling). Tomorrow I will have a guest post, then on Thursday I will present at least 2 more options for you to choose from. Stay tuned.
In the meantime, why don’t you check out some of these wonderful items yourselves at skymall.com. And tell them katdish sent you.
Then again, maybe just leave my name out of it…
What’s that you say? You’ve never read a katdish Sky Mall Post before? Well, you don’t even know me! Here they are, in all their glory:
Take a walk through my town and you’ll likely see more than one person who reminds you of yourself, if only on the inside—generally middle class, generally happy, generally a little worried about the state of things.
We walk the balance beam of prosperity here. Most have neither too much nor too little, and for the most part we’re good with that. We have enough to get by, enough to dream of having more, and enough to feel like we’re living our lives the way we’re supposed to.
There are exceptions, of course. Some have a lot of money and don’t mind telling you. Others struggle to make sure there’s dinner on the table. Me, I’ve always thought it was the rich people who had to be more careful about money than the poorer folks. The more you have, the more you want. That’s what I always say.
Money is a snare, Paul said in his first letter to Timothy. I think that’s true. I’ve seen a lot of people ruined by it. And not just the rich.
Enter Danny.
Danny lives in a modest home in a modest neighborhood, which is appropriate considering he has a modest family. Wife, daughter, son, and two dogs he takes hunting with him every year. Like most everyone else, Danny’s family has enough. More than enough, really. But for him, it’s always been too little. His job at the grocery store provides his family with the necessities of life. They have the shelter and the food and the clothing. But he’s always dreamed of having more.
The 1985 Chevy truck he drives to work can get him there, which is okay. But it can’t get him there in style, which would be even better. And his home, a twenty-year-old double wide with leaky faucets and drafty windows, is comfortable. But it’s not fancy. And if there is anything Danny wants in life, it’s a good dose of fancy.
Unfortunately for him, such a lifestyle cannot normally be gotten by stocking cans of chicken noodle soup and mopping floors. All Danny knows is groceries. Ask him where any item is, and he can tell you. A can of beans not labeled? Danny knows the price. Want to know how to tell a good watermelon from a bad one? Ask him. He’s given his life to the grocery store. Been there nearly twenty years.
But that’s where his talents end. Danny’s been given the opportunity over the years to climb the corporate ladder. Those grocery store managers don’t live in double-wides and drive twenty-year-old trucks, he says. But he’s found that some of the rungs on that ladder are missing, and he’s always ended up back where he started.
“I just don’t have much business sense,” he told me.
To him, he’s stuck. Stuck stocking shelves and emptying boxes and handling the cash register when someone calls in sick. And it makes him miserable. His is not a bad life, and he’ll admit that. But it is neither a good life, and that eats at him.
Still, he dreams of better things. He always carries around one of those free homes books so he can dream of where he wants to live and hate where he lives now. And the other day he got to sit in Travis Campbell’s new Chevy. Which just reminded him of how bad his own truck looks, of course.
I often wonder if what Danny would think if he lost what little he had. If he woke up one day and found his family and his home and his job gone. And I wonder, too, if I’m not a lot like him in some ways. I tend to look around at what everyone has and forget about all I’ve been given, too.
So I’ve made myself a promise. I’m going to be happy with what I have. No doubt I’ll still dream. Dreaming is good. But not when it keeps you asleep to your blessings.
And in the meantime, I’ll say a prayer for Danny. I hope he wakes up, too. Because as far as I can tell, he’s the only poor person I’ve ever known who was ruined by money.
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To read more from Billy Coffey, visit him at at his website and follow him on the twitter at @billycoffey.
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P.S. – I just wanted to take this opportunity to wish my friend Wendy A VERY HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
Now, y’all go over to her blog, Weight…What? and do that same, kay?
From time to time on this blog, I will do book reviews. I am currently reading Vince Antonucci’s new book Guerilla Lovers, and I plan to review it very soon. Vince’s first book, I became a Christian and all I got was this lousy t-shirt , remains one of my all time favorite books. The following is an excerpt from that book:
Excerpt from “I became a Christian and all I got was this lousy t-shirt: Replacing Souvenir Religion with Authentic Spiritual Passion” by Vince Antonucci
Staff members at my church take one day each month to fast and pray. It’s a day designed to get away and get close to God, to focus on him and pray for the church. I decided to spend one prayer and fasting day at Burger King. I know this sounds bizzare, but I wasn’t going to eat. Normally, I go to a park or the beach on my prayer day, but it was cold outside, so I wanted a place where I could be inside but by myself. When I do my fasting day I don’t eat, but I do drink, so I thought, I’ll go to Burger King, get a Coke, sit there for a couple hours, read my Bible, and write in my journal. So I went in, got my Coke, sat down, and started reading.
Two minutes later a dirty, smelly guy came walking up. He was obviously extremely poor, probably homeless. He started pacing in front of my table. I glanced up several times but tried not to make eye contact because I wanted to keep reading my bible. After all, this was a day for me. My goal was to get me closer to God. Finally, I felt guilty and thought, This isn’t right. Vince, you need to take some time, die to yourself, and love this guy. So I asked, “Hey, can I help you with anything?”
Turns out the guy was from India. He started talking, but I could barely decipher his words. Finally, he handed me a piece of paper. It was a job application for Burger King. I said, “Oh, you want to apply here. Do you need help filling this out?” He nodded yes, so we got to work. It was difficult. One question asked about experience. I think he said he used to be a cook. In Florida? India? Indiana? Another requested his home address, but he didn’t have one. It took nearly an hour. Finally, we were done and he walked to the counter to turn it in. I thought, It’s good that I helped him, but I’m glad that’s over. I went back to reading.
One minute later he was sitting back at my table. I said, “Oh, Hi.” He sat and stared at me. I thought, Maybe he’s hungry. “Do you need something to eat?” I asked. He said yes, so I gave him a few dollars. And he appreciated it. He really appreciated it. He grabbed both my hands and started rubbing them all over his face and neck. I thought, Oh…my…goodness! This is so weird! Finally, after the thirty most awkward seconds of my life, he grabbed my money and disappeared. I thought, Wow. Well, it’s a good thing that I helped him. But I am so glad that’s over. I went back to reading.
Two minutes later he was sitting back at my table. This time he had a burger and fries. I thought, Maybe he just needs someone to talk to. I started a conversation, and then he asked me about the Bible I was reading. I started to explain that I believed in Jesus. A smile erupted on his face and he pulled his wallet out. He proudly showed me a picture of Jesus. I said, “Yeah, that’s who I’m telling you about!” Then he proceeded to show me pictures of Buddha, Muhammad, a goat, Reggie Jackson, there may have been some pictures of Regis Philbin, the Dali Lama, and Bea Arthur in there as well. He became very serious and asked, “Do you know what God’s name is?”
I said, “Yes, I’m trying to explain to you –I believe his name is Jesus. Jesus is God’s Son.”
He said, “No! God’s name is twenty-one!”
“Huh?”
“God’s name is twenty-one. Do you understand?” he demanded.
“Yeah, you just said God’s name is Twenty-one.”
His voice was rising, “No. No! God’s name is twenty-one.”
I repeated, “God’s name is Twenty-one.”
“No! God’s name is Twenty-one!”
“Got it. God’s name is Twenty-one.”
“No! God’s name is Twenty-one!”
Finally, I put an end to our Abbot and Costello routine and asked him to please explain what he meant. He tried. I think what he was struggling to say was that he believed that all religions worship the same God and that God is called by twenty-one different names in the various religions of the world, and so he has twenty-one names.
“Okay, I understand now,” I said. “But I believe there is only one God, and Jesus was his Son.”
“He asked, “Do you know who is God today?”
I answered, “Twenty-one?”
“No,” he said. “Today, you are God to me.”
“No, I’m not God,” I responded.
“Yes, you are,” he countered.
“No,” I explained. “I’m trying to show you the love of God, but I’m not God.”
“No. Today you love me,” he said. “You help me. You feed me. Who is God? He loves, he helps, he feeds. Today, you are God to me.”
In one sense he was theologically wrong, because I’m certainly not God. But in another sense, he was right. Because God has asked me to represent him, to be his ambassador.
We need to be the good news before we share the good news so that our gospel has integrity. We need to make the gospel beautiful again. We need to lose all the trappings so people can experience the natural beauty of God’s good news. We need to show people what life in God’s kingdom is like before we invite them into it.
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To read more from Vince Antonucci, check out his website VinceAntonucci.com, and I’m pretty sure he wouldn’t mind if you buy either or both of his books, either. Just saying…
