Katdish.net

Several years ago, before the days of ipods and music downloads, I bought a CD on a whim. I’d never heard of the artist before, but something drew me to that CD. I now own 4 CDs by Jonathan Butler. He’s an amazingly talented acoustic guitarist with a voice like butter. He’s also a Christian, although not all of his work would be categorized in that genre.

I came across this song again recently and recalled how listening to it helped me through some difficult times. I share it today along with a prayer for anyone stumbling through the dark to look up. Miracles really do happen.

In a Miracle (by Jonathan Butler)

I know you feel like letting go
You’ve suffered more than I could know
But if you’d seen the things that I’ve seen
Hold on my brother now,
It wont be long

Don’t think that He’s forgotten you
He’s by your side within you too
Through your worst fears
He’s right there
Waiting for you now
Waiting for you

He can make any desert bloom
In a heart like yours there’s room
for changes
and the change is coming soon
Don’t you know it’s just begun?
We’ll move that mountain with love

In a miracle

And all the things you used to know
Like skies of blue and fields of snow
With my hand on my heart
I promise they are
waiting for you now
waiting for you

He can make any desert bloom
in a heart like yours there’s room
for changes
and the change is coming soon
Don’t you know it’s just begun?
We’ll move that mountain with love

In a miracle

There’s no limt to
all the things He can do
Imagine what He can do for you
He’ll rescue you safe
from the prison of pain
and back to your life again

Tears bring Him closer
closer to you

He can make any desert bloom
in a heart like yours there’s room
for changes
and the change is coming soon
Don’t you know it’s just begun?
We’ll move that mountain with love

In a miracle

Last week I mentioned I had an interesting conversation on the twitter that would have to wait until this week, and while it is not here in its entirety, I think there’s enough here that you’ll get the gist of it, which is this:
Don’t be talking smack to me about Texas.
Especially if you’ve never been here. And no, I’m not kidding. Not even a little bit. We’re proud of our state, and for good reason, just as I’m sure (I’m hoping) that you have pride in your own state. Nuff said. (Folks from Oklahoma are exempt from this rule, but we have a mutual understanding about making fun of each other’s states.)

In other news, I took a little heat for humiliating my dog, but I think he actually enjoyed being dressed like a chicken. Okay, maybe not. But I sure got a kick out of it!

And now, the best of me (or not) on the twitter this week:

@ServingStrong Very true. (in reply to ServingStrong What a profound statement for all of us to say!)

@edcyzewski Not so much, no. (in reply to edcyzewski @katdish No self esteem issues I see…

Being me has its perks.

This particular copy will be personally autographed by @billycoffey. Details on Monday at katdish.net

There have been several great giveaways for @billycoffey’s #snowdaybook so far. And I will be giving away one, too.

@tonyjalicea It’s funny and punny.

@tonyjalicea Luuuuuke! I am your fodder! (in reply to tonyjalicea Fodder is a funny word.)

@TheMikeEllis You are correct. As I have an overwhelming desire to bury turds. (in reply to TheMikeEllis @katdish doesn’t play well in sandbox)

@TheMikeEllis Thanks. And good call, as I am freakishly strong for a girl. (in reply to TheMikeEllis The Christ following chick I’d take into a bar fight is @katdish #ff)

RT @TPO_Hisself: Biden: Just because the Recovery Act was a monumental failure, does not mean that it is not a huge success.//Snort!

I’m synching my iPhone to my computer. Whatever that means.

@RachelleGardner I can live with that. (in reply to RachelleGardner @katdish Okay then, you’ be terrible at the “would you rather” game my kids like to play. 🙂 Refusing to choose is cheating!)

@RachelleGardner I don’t wanna. Besides, writers should concentrate on writing & let folks like us make them famous. (in reply to RachelleGardner @katdish The point of this game is to CHOOSE! :-))

I choose both>RT @RachelleGardner: Writers — what if you had to choose between financial success or critical acclaim?

@kelybreez But there will always be a demand for a good story. Always.

@kelybreez The reality of publishing is that it is a for profit business. Marginal books sell b/c they’re written by famous people.

@sarahmsalter I’m really looking forward to old age. I’ll be that crazy old lady at family gatherings that everyone just smiles politely at.

@billycoffey You need to stop being sick. You’re no good to me dead.

@sarahmsalter Is your grand daddy Yogi Berra? Snort! (in reply to sarahmsalter @katdish Yep. He also said, “It’ll quit hurting when it stops.” And “always keep your tail behind you.” 🙂 #homespunwisdom)

@tonyjalicea Ha! You’re the only one. (in reply to tonyjalicea @katdish I totally retained my man card today.)

@Helenatrandom Scandalous! (in reply to Helenatrandom @katdish I had a crush on Mr. Rogers. I told a Nun I worked with about it as an adult. She was shocked, since he is a Presbyterian! SNORT)

@CandySteele Not that there’s anything wrong with that…

@CandySteele Do you know what’s more annoying that Happy Meal toys? Adults who collect them & sell them on ebay.

@MichaelDPerkins Thanks Michael. You’re being awfully nice today. Do you owe me money? (in reply to MichaelDPerkins If you want to learn how to write better then start reading @gyoung9751 @katdish @gritandglory All are ridiculously good.)

@kelybreez I would, but it’s already sopping wet with your man-tears (in reply to kelybreez I use my man card to wipe my tears.)

@br8kthru Yeah. And some serious man-card violations. (in reply to br8kthru @katdish I know! Lots of eye-opening comments though. :))

@br8kthru You’re welcome. Who knew your post would be such a cry fest?

@jewda4 Yeah, way to kick a kid when he’s down. (in reply to jewda4 @katdish yeah, and that cuts deep. I don’t live there, and I’m hurting for my fellow fatties.)

So, basically they’re saying, “Hey fat kid! No toys for you!”

Deep, breathy sigh…SF area McDonalds may disallow toys in Happy Meals if fat & calorie counts are too high to help curb childhood obesity.

RT @br8kthru: Top 5 Cartoon Criers- go ahead & weigh in w/ your thoughts! http://ow.ly/1rox4Z//Yes. @dlrayburn broke spades w/Barbie

Is it just me, or is Chris Matthews of MSNBC a grumpy ho?

@TheMikeEllis Nah. If you give me any trouble I’ll send the @billycoffey mafia after you. Great to talk to you. (in reply to TheMikeEllis I feel very important. I just got off the phone with @katdish She is currently changing her number.)

End of mini rant.

The government needs to get the hell out of the way and let people work without getting taxed out of business.

I guess my main disagreement with current leadership is their belief that the government needs to create jobs.

And since when do snowman have teeth? What kind of nightmare decor company comes up w/this stuff? http://plixi.com/p/54613868

GAAA! Scary elf. http://plixi.com/p/54613621

Aaaand done. Except for stapling the top, which somebody else can do. http://plixi.com/p/54605660

@Helenatrandom Of course. (in reply to Helenatrandom @katdish HEY!! I saw a cute little Alice in Wonderland teapot in their flyer that I was thinking of getting.. (but only if it is functional)

@weightwhat you have my Chicago address, right? C/O @Helenatrandom? (in reply to weightwhat @katdish I went to Tuesday Morning today. Saw lots of crap. Be expecting a large package soon.)

Stock up and save! This one’s on clearance. Can’t imagine why it didn’t sell. http://plixi.com/p/54593816

@weightwhat why didn’t I think of that? You should be my wingman in Houston traffic. (in reply to weightwhat @katdish Maybe you should have just parked on top of them.)

This is Texas. Get a gas guzzling SUV for crying out loud.

Silly little matchbox cars. They should make them park 2 to a space. I thought I had a parking space twice, but I just couldn’t see them.

The non virtual world needs me. TTFN.

@CandySteele Or blue? http://yfrog.com/4pfqvj

@CandySteele What about green? http://yfrog.com/50z86fj

@CandySteele Oh-Em-Gee. Check this out: http://yfrog.com/bcb3jwj I stripped that paper for a client last year. Same monster flower family.

(in reply to CandySteele @katdish This paper was the rage..in it’s day. Yes, rugly. No other colors http://twitpic.com/338b55 http://twitpic.com/338bcu #shutup)

@billycoffey Snort! (in reply to billycoffey @katdish You’re awful.)

@billycoffey HA! You said duty… (in reply to billycoffey Good morning, folks. Don’t forget to vote today. It’s not just a duty, it’s a privilege.)

Just woke up from a 14 hour Benedryl induced nap. Good morning!

Can a person sneeze to death? Is that possible?

@mabeswife I’ve sneezed approx 100 times this morning. Stupid weather.

Candy inspection time. I must remove all questionable treats & those I happen to really like http://plixi.com/p/54359157

@CandySteele I’m thinking taco. (in reply to CandySteele @katdish Did Buddy Love get his dignity back? Next year you may as well make him a green pig totally shatter his ego.)

@weightwhat Nah. He LOVES that costume. Can’t you tell? (in reply to weightwhat @katdish Did you find poo in your shoes this morning?)

@muchl8r Yes. Also? He’s a dog. (in reply to muchl8r @katdish I want to feel bad for your dog, but people do that to their kids, too so whatever)

@SBeeCreations Had to take him inside. The barking chicken was scaring the little kids.

@TheMikeEllis Hey. You’re not the boss of me. (in reply to TheMikeEllis @katdish hey hush up.)

@LizFentonDecker Ooo! You know what? If he comes back, I’m giving him a rock! (in reply to LizFentonDecker ‘All I got was a rock!’)

@kelybreez Yes. Hush, hush. Voices carry. Story of my life. (in reply to kelybreez @katdish Voices Carry. Anyone remember that song by Til Tuesday?)

Accepting his fate http://plixi.com/p/54209027

Per @CandySteele’s request http://plixi.com/p/54207027

@CandySteele flip flops, jeans and a black shirt. I’m going subtle. (in reply to CandySteele @katdish Whatchya wearing?)

But come on–a 50 something bald guy dressed as Charlie Brown? That’s funny right there.

Just been told I need to keep my costume editorials myself because apparently, my voice carries.

Sitting on the driveway waiting on the onslaught of trick or treaters.

@mayaREguru Oh, ponies are okay. (in reply to mayaREguru @katdish what if I send you a pony? :D)

If you send me ad links you will be reported as spam. Have a nice day.

“Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than speak out and remove all doubt.” ~ Abraham Lincoln

@Helenatrandom That’s what I was thinking! (in reply to Helenatrandom @katdish Perfect! A snuggie to match my undies!)

@weightwhat No snuggie for me, but I think I found one for @Helenatrandom http://plixi.com/p/53813451

@duane_scott Yes. I’m sure your 100 lb. bag was way over the limit. (in reply to duane_scott @katdish yes. I’m sure. I once tried to go to TEXAS, but I didn’t arrive at the border with a 50 lb. bag of ego so I was sent back.)

@duane_scott Now see, if you had spent any time in Texas you would know that it is awesome. (in reply to duane_scott @katdish I’m learning new stuff everyday. My sister and her husband are moving to Texas. #justrealizediwillhavetovisit #suckstobeme)

@redclaydiaries Or something like that… (in reply to redclaydiaries @katdish I think he must have small-state syndrome. @duane_scott)

@duane_scott What do you know about Texas? (in reply to duane_scott @CandySteele so I can “train” my phone to capitalize texas? I may do it for @katdish for her Christmas present.)

@duane_scott How very thoughtful to get something for yourself for me for Christmas. (in reply to duane_scott @CandySteele so I can “train” my phone to capitalize texas? I may do it for @katdish for her Christmas present.)

@redclaydiaries Why yes. I think you did. (in reply to redclaydiaries @katdish Thank you! Did I get here in time for Pick on @duane_scott Time?)

@Learell It’s truly a gift to be easily amused. (in reply to Learell @katdish yes. Cheetoes for sure. (phone just attempted to correct that to cherries and I laughed. It’s late)

RT @redclaydiaries: @duane_scott “It’s” educational system? I think your google dictionary needs to review possessives.//Snort!

@duane_scott I beg your pardon. My kids go to one the highest rated districts in the country. (in reply to duane_scott @katdish it will be the google dictionary on my phone that doesn’t capitalize texas because obviously, it’s education system is too poor.)

@duane_scott Would that be the one written in crayon where you don’t capitalize “Texas”? (in reply to duane_scott @katdish I’m with @lainiegallagher. “Irregardless” is not a word. I will bring my dictionary to texas. @kelybreez)

Did you see this?

Let’s put aside for a moment that MSNBC dares to call itself a news station when they chose five liberals to cover a historic national election. Nevermind that they acted like a group of giggly school children instead of a seasoned, respected group of unbiased folks who are supposed to report the news. One could make the argument that Fox News Channel is dominated by conservative views and CNN is dominated by their liberal counterparts. But in defense of both networks, they had representatives from both the democratic and republican points of view. They differentiated between opinion and fact. Which is exactly what they should do.

I suppose NBC decided they had nothing to lose, since Comcast has bought the network and is fixing to clean house, but as annoying as all of this is to me, what really bothers me is the blatent disrespect Matthews has for anyone who doesn’t share his political views.

Regardless of his personal feelings for Congresswoman Bachmann, she is a seated member of the Congress of the United States of America. Furthermore, she is a human being. Whatever happened to good manners? Respect for the office? I don’t always agree with the decisions or even the rhetoric of elected officials on either side of the aisle, but that doesn’t give me permission to attempt to publicly humiliate those I don’t agree with. You can’t knowingly set out to steal someone else’s dignity without losing some of your own.

As to his denial of the “tingly leg” comment — He never said that, huh?

Okay, thrill…not tingle. I stand corrected. Yes, Mr. Matthews. You are completely objective.

I long for the days when rude behavior was frowned upon rather than celebrated…

“I hate rude behavior in a man. I won’t tolerate it.”
~ Gus McCrae, Lonesome Dove

When my now 13 year old son was in the 2nd grade, I was asked to help design the set for the class musical, “Bugz”. It was my first introduction to set design on a large scale. Who knew you could do so much with giant rolls of paper? The set turned out well. So did the costumes. I decided two things after the experience. First, I decided that I would volunteer to make the sets for each of musicals my 2 kids were involved in, secondly I decided that I would never again volunteer to be in charge of the set AND the costumes. You would think figuring out how to make 300 pairs of bug wings out of panty hose and coat hangers (in 6 different colors, no less) would be a blast, but really not so much…

But the set design part? Love that. Mostly because the great music teachers have pretty much given me free reign to create whatever I think will best represent the overall theme of the show. As I’ve mentioned, I’ve helped design a set for bugs:

For boys and girls venturing west:

And for students ready for summer:

This year, I was asked to design the set for Lewis and Clark, and while there are plenty of willing volunteers whom I could have called upon to help me out, I choose to go it alone this time. My original plan was to make an elaborate mountain scene with the Pacific Ocean in the background. But after reading the script, I decided that this time, a simple map of the USA circa 1803 would suffice and lend better to the story. As a bonus, this also saved me about 2 weeks worth of work — win/win.

I’m a people person, but there are times when I truly enjoy being alone. Creating this set was one of those times.

It was one of those rare times in a creative endeavor of mine when I knew exactly what I wanted to do and the steps involved to get there.

The rolling out of the background paper,

the stapling and straightening and smoothing,

and re-stapling and re-straightening and re-smoothing,

the background for the map

until it was reasonably smooth and straight.

(This process is much easier said than done.)

I don’t know who invented the overhead projector, 

but God bless them! It makes things so much easier.

No peeking: Can you name the yellow, green and red areas?

How did you do?

The set is mostly done. Someone needs to staple the blue paper to the top of the wall. But after sliding off an extension ladder from the height of where the top of that paper is 2 years ago, that someone is not going to be me.

So, that’s what I’ve been up to lately.

I bet you thought this post was going to be about the election, huh?

How to Draw a Picture (Part 9)
(Excerpt from Duma Key by Stephen King)

Look for the picture inside the picture. It’s not always easy to see, but it’s always there. And if you miss it, you can miss the world.

This is the ninth installment of my adventure into serious writing. It’s still not something that I’m completely comfortable with. As a matter of fact, I could never imagine it was anything I would even consider. But to quote one of my favorite lines from the book this series is based upon,

“God always punishes us for the things we can’t imagine.”

And while the biblical implications of that statement are at odds with what I believe to be the Truth, still – it makes me pause.

When I started this silly little blog in April of 2008, it never dawned on me that I would be so inspired by so many talented, amazing people. Among those near the top of that list would be Jeanne Damoff.

I described Jeanne a couple of weeks ago in the following tweet: “Follow @jeannedamoff. She’s like me, only classy.”

Okay, so maybe she’s not so much like me. She holds degrees in social work, sociology, English, and secondary education. Wife to George, mother to Jacob, Grace and Luke. From her bio: “Jeanne is a published writer, a professional choreographer, a musician, and a speaker. She loves to laugh and gives points to anyone who makes her laugh out loud. These points are very valuable. Everyone should strive to earn them, starting now.” As impressed as I was with her writing thus far, I was completely unprepared for the book she sent me.

When I read the quote from Duma Key that inspires these posts, I knew I had to share a bit of her story. So many of us often miss the picture inside the picture, but if we look for it, there is astounding beauty to be found. Jacob Damoff is a shining example of such beauty. Again, here’s Jeanne in her own words:

In May 1996, the world ended. We traded “Happily Ever After” for brokenness and sorrow. My book, Parting the Waters: Finding Beauty in Brokenness , tells the story of Jacob’s drowning accident and our family’s subsequent journey through a valley of lost dreams and into a deeper understanding of God’s sovereignty. As our eyes adjusted to the shadows, the beauty of God’s plan came into focus. A pebble is dropped into a pond. Ripples are set in motion. Ever widening, they accomplish eternal purposes visible to those who choose to see.

I literally have a stack of books four feet high that are waiting patiently to be read. But once I picked up Jeanne’s book, I could not put it down. If you’ve ever struggled to understand why bad things happen to good people and can’t seem to find the silver lining in the clouds of life, I would highly recommend this book.

And you know I know a good book when I read one, right?

The blog carnival topic for this time around is Reconciliation. Check out some other great posts on this topic at my friend Bridget’s place, One Word at a Time. I love this story written by my friend Annie last year. There’s more to the story. You can find it by visiting her blog, Buzz by Annie’s.

******

For over five weeks I had avoided going into her room but I knew sooner or later I was going to have to face the daunting task of packing up the things she left behind.

I looked around the room and took in the few items left hanging in the closet, mainly the old clothes she didn’t wear anymore. The desk held a few nick knacks, school supplies and stuffed animals. The walls had been left mostly bare except for the remnants of her high school volleyball days and a random tack here and there.

I climbed up on the bunk bed and began taking down the volleyball shirts one-by-one. Player number on the front, name across the back. One shirt had the words ‘Team Captain’ boldly printed across the chest, and I had a flashback to the moment she told me she’d made captain. There were bags she had hung that had been decorated by her ‘secret bear pal’ and given to her on the days we played our cross town rival. Pictures of her with the team, the saying, ‘you wish you could hit like a girl’ and the ’10 Reasons I Play Volleyball’, all came down one at a time along with the memories I had of her volleyball days.

I climbed down from the bunk bed and began going through the items on her desk. There was an Angel jewelry holder that she had painted at a little pottery studio we had visited and I carefully wrapped it up and put it into a box. I gently tucked the stuffed animals into the box along with jewelry, pictures, old cell phone chargers, books, and school projects that she had worked so diligently on.

As I cleaned off her desk, I noticed the tiny white Christmas lights that she had strung around her desk and up the bunk bed. I plugged them in and continued working.

I went to the closet and began opening the drawers of her dresser, a hand-me-down from when I was a little girl. As I opened the top drawer I smiled at the mismatched socks in it. We had always laughed about the fact that she never wore matching socks. And there was not a match in the drawer. I closed the drawer and left the socks as they were.

Other drawers held old high school sweatshirts that I packed along with the volleyball shirts into a box. The jewelry box she’d had as a girl that was tucked safely away in the third drawer down was just going to stay put. For now.

As I surveyed the room, I hadn’t realized how late it had gotten and the room was becoming dark except for the white Christmas lights. I glanced over at her desk and my eyes landed on the blue dolphin lamp sitting there. Blue was her favorite color and she’d always loved dolphins. I reached over to turn the lamp on and it lit up as mini lightning bolts raced through the dolphin. I stood there for a moment watching the lightning show…and then the tear fell.

And it fell for the emptiness of the room.

And then another fell for the hurt and sadness of my daughter walking out the door and not looking back.

And another fell, for not seeing her in those mismatched socks.

And then the tears came.

For wondering how the dreams for ones child could go so wrong somewhere along the way and for feeling like I was packing up all the memories I had of her 17 years into a few boxes.

And for missing the hugs, the kisses and the ‘I love yous’, the laughter, the quiet moments, singing Lady Gaga in the car, being goofy, baking cookies and watching movies.

And they fell because I won’t watch her graduate from my old alma mater, and because don’t want to miss out on her future.

And they fell because I’m afraid she doesn’t know how much I miss her.

************************

As I sat there letting the tears fall I knew it was only the beginning. There will be many more tears in the coming weeks, and who knows, maybe months because there is a lot of healing in our relationship that needs to happen, for both of us. But, there is one thing that I am certain of where my daughter and I are concerned. And that is no matter what the differences are, or what trials we face, or how mad and disappointed we are with each other, she knows I love her and I know she loves me.

I am a big believer in the value of chores in the life of a child. My kids work. They keep their rooms clean, help clear the table after dinner, dust, and pitch in with the yard work. They even clean the bathrooms. And by doing such, they are introduced to what will one day become one of the most basic tenets of their lives—if you work and do a good job, you will be compensated accordingly.

But there is one chore that requires a No Children Allowed sign to be hung from it. In big, bold letters that are underlined and italicized.

They are not to help me wash the vehicles.

Never.

The reasons are pretty selfish. I’m man enough to admit that. And it’s a pride thing, too. I like my wife’s car and my truck clean. Spotless, even. I like the windshield completely free of bug guts, the tires shined, the wheels polished. I like the fact that a doctor could perform open heart surgery on my dashboard. Such things are important to me, as they should be to any man.

The problem, of course, is that having two kids involved makes the proper cleaning of a vehicle impossible. More often than not, they’re the ones responsible for the mess in the first place—the cracker crumbs, the soda stains, the castoff M&M that has melted into the seat. Ask them to clean that up, and you’ll only wind up with a bigger mess.

Which is why I always very politely and very casually brush their pleas aside whenever they ask to help. Usually works, too. But it didn’t last night. No amount of brushing aside would silence the chorus of “Please, Daddy?” My children employed one of their most powerful weapons in getting me to do what they wanted—they couldn’t convince me, so they just wore me down.

I decided to limit the damage by prohibiting them to handle the water hose and the vacuum. Those would be mine alone to control. So while I cleaned the interior, I put them on trash detail. Everything that couldn’t be sucked up the hose was their responsibility. And as we’d driven 140 miles the day before to a wedding, there was much to keep them busy.

My son found the Star Wars action figure he knew he’d left in the dirt outside the reception hall. The momentary shout of glee resulted in my daughter dancing for him, which evolved in the two of them dancing together in the back of the SUV, which then devolved into an impromptu light saber fight with the vacuum hose as a prop. I settled them down, but not before my son claimed victory by sucking half of my daughter’s hair into the hose.

I tried to keep them on task. Couldn’t. A stray Crayon and torn napkin found under the seat was reason enough for an art lesson. A forgotten pack of Tic-Tacs started a shoving match. The heat made them tired and cranky.

Washing the outside only made things worse. My daughter wanted to be in charge of the rinsing, but chose to rinse everything besides the truck. She rinsed the driveway and the grass and the neighbor’s dog. She rinsed her brother (yet another shoving match). And my son’s wash-whatever-you-want-however-you-want-to philosophy with the sponge didn’t help.

It was all too much for one adult to handle, so I did what any mature father would do.

I snapped.

I asked my daughter for the hose and my son for the sponge, then proceeded to drown them both in suds and water. They raced around the truck to hide. I found them. My son tried to crawl through the grass and escape. I pulled him back. But by then my daughter had managed to get the hose back, and she sprayed me. I kinked the hose and held it until she wondered what had happened and pointed the nozzle toward her face. The three of us ended in an exhausted heap in the front yard. The only words were uttered by my son, who looked up at the clouds and said, “That was the most awesome thing ever!”

We didn’t get the truck washed last night.

It’s sitting in the driveway with splotches of dirt mixed with small areas of cleanliness. It looks like a mechanical zebra.

But that’s okay. At least, that’s what I’m telling myself.

Because there is a time for chores and a time for fun, and sometimes there is a time for both.

To read more from Billy Coffey visit him at What I Learned Today and follow him on the twitter at @billycoffey.