Words with Friends: An idiot’s guide

After much nagging from a few online friends, I decided to download a free Words with Friends app onto my iPhone a few months ago. Of course, having never played Scrabble before, I had no clue what to do. In retrospect, I suppose I could have googled “How to play words with friends”, but that would have been entirely too obvious and logical.

Instead, I would open the app every few days and stare at it. I started a few games, but it kept telling me something about an invalid tile placement or some such nonsense. I’m sure whomever I was attempting to play with assumed a toddler had gotten hold of their mother’s cell phone, and if anyone who doesn’t read this blog asks, that’s the story I’m going with.

New screen for Words with Friends

Now, before you Scrabble/Words with Friends experts roll your eyes at me (some of you probably already are), let me explain how I interpreted this game screen.

  • The Star — Yeah. No idea what that was about. I didn’t realize your first word had to have one of the letters on that star. As a matter of fact, I thought one of the objects was to AVOID the star. (Welcome to my brain.)
  • DL, TL, DW, TW, et. al. — As some of you may know, I’m not a big fan of acronyms, so my brain does not seek them out. Imagine my frustration when I would make a great word like hanDLe, or DWight or TWeet and it refused me. Stupid game…

So now do you see why I never got past the first round of this game? Fortunately, the lovely and talented Amy Nabors, aka @amykiane showed me the errors of my ways. Now I’ve had the distinct pleasure of being completely annihilated by friends and strangers alike! I’ve lost count of how many games I’ve played over the last two days, but I do know the results of every game completed. I’VE LOST EVERY SINGLE GAME! Even when kind people like 1357bob took pity on me and tried to give me opportunities to score more than 5 points per round:

So, there you have it. The complete idiot’s guide to Words with Friends. If you want to boost your ego by playing quite possibly the worst Words with Friends player in the history of the world, I’m Katdish10.

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