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Words with Friends: An idiot’s guide

After much nagging from a few online friends, I decided to download a free Words with Friends app onto my iPhone a few months ago. Of course, having never played Scrabble before, I had no clue what to do. In retrospect, I suppose I could have googled “How to play words with friends”, but that would have been entirely too obvious and logical.

Instead, I would open the app every few days and stare at it. I started a few games, but it kept telling me something about an invalid tile placement or some such nonsense. I’m sure whomever I was attempting to play with assumed a toddler had gotten hold of their mother’s cell phone, and if anyone who doesn’t read this blog asks, that’s the story I’m going with.

New screen for Words with Friends

Now, before you Scrabble/Words with Friends experts roll your eyes at me (some of you probably already are), let me explain how I interpreted this game screen.

  • The Star — Yeah. No idea what that was about. I didn’t realize your first word had to have one of the letters on that star. As a matter of fact, I thought one of the objects was to AVOID the star. (Welcome to my brain.)
  • DL, TL, DW, TW, et. al. — As some of you may know, I’m not a big fan of acronyms, so my brain does not seek them out. Imagine my frustration when I would make a great word like hanDLe, or DWight or TWeet and it refused me. Stupid game…

So now do you see why I never got past the first round of this game? Fortunately, the lovely and talented Amy Nabors, aka @amykiane showed me the errors of my ways. Now I’ve had the distinct pleasure of being completely annihilated by friends and strangers alike! I’ve lost count of how many games I’ve played over the last two days, but I do know the results of every game completed. I’VE LOST EVERY SINGLE GAME! Even when kind people like 1357bob took pity on me and tried to give me opportunities to score more than 5 points per round:

So, there you have it. The complete idiot’s guide to Words with Friends. If you want to boost your ego by playing quite possibly the worst Words with Friends player in the history of the world, I’m Katdish10.

Stuff This Christian Likes: Catalyst One Day

Alright, alright…Jon Acuff was NOT dressed like a pimp, nor did he have any large security guards surrounding him. As he promised on SCL, he was fairly easy to spot:

He was sporting the red down vest and the blue backpack choke full-o-skittles. I was pretty stoked that I was able to sit with him at the conference. Rather than give you a blow by blow of everything that happened at Catalyst (because frankly, I can’t remember everything), I’ll just give you a few things that stuck out in my mind:

  • When everyone started pouring in to the main hall, I followed Jon to where he and his wife typically sit on Sunday mornings. (Hopefully not in a weird, stalkerish way.)
  • Once seated, I call my husband and say, “I’m sitting next to Jon Acuff!”, while Jon Acuff calls his wife and says, “I’m sitting next to Katdish!”. I found this ridiculously funny.
  • Steve Fee lead worship. Yes, THAT Steve Fee. And yes, it was awesome.

  • I had to make a conscious effort NOT to look at Jon Acuff during this, because I found myself wondering if he was doing the “pound cake” or the “watermelon”. Shame on me.
  • Randomly thinking to myself that attending Catalyst at North Point is like witnessing countless SCL posts come to life. Also realize that Jon Acuff is literally sitting on a gold mine of future posts.
  • Realize that I may have to write an annoying comment on Dr. Tim Keller’s website just to let him know that I may have a new Super Mega-Pastor crush. Cuz Craig Groeschel is all that and a bag-o-chips. Anyone who can tell a packed room full of ministry people that if their vision is to be a mega church that they’re STUPID, is way cool in my book. (Said the chick from the tiny church plant.) Also wondering if he would be a father of 6 if there had been such a thing as a Snuggie or Slanket “back in the day”.
  • First break: I grab my giant briefcase and rush to stand in line to get a picture of Andy Stanley and Zeke. I attempt to encapsulate the meaning behind Zeke in 10 seconds to Andy Stanley, give up and just take the picture. He was real sweet not to visibly roll his eyes at me.
  • Attempt to get back to my seat after coming in late. The aisle of seats at North Point are VERY CLOSE together. Whist carrying my large, heavy briefcase over my head, I lose my balance, fall into the lap of a rather tall, relevant looking guy. Apologize profusely, get my big butt back to my seat, more than a little embarrassed at the scene I’ve just created.
  • Am comforted by the words of Jon Acuff, who simply says in a hushed tone, “Nice.”
  • More great praise and worship music, more awesome wisdom from Andy Stanley and Craig Groeschel. Free stuff, Q&A time, yada, yada, yada.
  • Catalyst One Day draws to a close, but not before I finally get to meet Pete Wilson in the hallway. And yes, he’s as nice in person as you imagine he would be.
  • Free hotel shuttle picks me up at North Point. She is late because traffic at that place is ridiculous. By the time I get back to the hotel, I have roughly 5 minutes to brush my teeth and have 2 pieces of Trident gum for dinner. Time to head out to “Off the Blogs”!

To be continued…