Katdish.net

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Well dang. I wrote a post this week called Why I hate writing that was very pissy. So pissy, if fact, that I almost didn’t publish it. Mucho gracio (yes–I’m bilingual) to @jewda for reading the rough draft and giving me the thumbs up to publish it. (Apparently, he is the boss of me.) It’s summertime and I have vowed not to look at my analytics unless absolutely necessary because not as many folks read blogs in the summer. (Yeah, yeah…it’s not about numbers, I know, but still–I don’t need that crushing blow to my ego.) But based on the number of comments and retweets, if I did check them, I’m guessing that post got quite a few hits. Which just proves my theory that writers are gluttons for punishment. If they weren’t, they wouldn’t be writers–Duh.

In other news, my house is still being invaded by evil lizards…

The best of me (or not) on the twitter this week:

@amysorrells Wait…I thought that was a good therapist. (in reply to amysorrells RT @noveldoctor: A good storyteller knows how to make questions look like answers and answers look like questions.)

“The road to hell is paved with adverbs.” ~ Stephen King

@Brian_Russell Yes. (in reply to Brian_Russell My church bothers me. Is that my fault or theirs?)

@KathleenOverby Now see — I’m down with that. (in reply to KathleenOverby @katdish @mrsmetaphor Loverby ‘roughs it’ for me-his idea is Embassy Suites.)

@KathleenOverby We are going camping next weekend. And by “camping” I mean A/C winnabago. That’s roughing it for me (in reply to KathleenOverby Do you camp?)

And….Good Morning! Going to the Walmarts to start your day is not advisable.

I’m considering writing a Part 2 to my Why I hate writing/writers post today. Because clearly, writers love the abuse.

RT @jewda”I think you need to work on being less of a fat lummox.” Arthur Spooner speaks right to my heart

@KathleenOverby Thanks. Anytime I can combine encouragement with an incessant rant, I consider that a personal victory (in reply to KathleenOverby @katdish You know how you love to encourage writers? …it’s a ‘cast your bread upon the waters’ thing…..you are in for a ride, girl~)

@ksluiter 96% of the time? What about the other 4%? Are you saying you don’t like me? (in reply to ksluiter @katdish me too. they are my favorite. because I relate 96% of the time.)

@ksluiter Well thank you. I love a good rant. (in reply to ksluiter @katdish that post was awesome.)

@Brian_Russell Even if they don’t deserve it, they think they do. Guess I can’t go wrong there (in reply to Brian_Russell They deserve it!)

Wow! My post is getting lots of traffic today. I should insult writers more often.

@gyoung9751 I was pretty grumpy yesterday… (in reply to gyoung9751 @katdish You toned it down? My hair caught on fire just reading it.)

@Helenatrandom Thanks. You should have seen it before I toned it down! (in reply to Helenatrandom @katdish Hi! Nice katrant today.)

@JeanneDamoff SNORT! I’m not telling you (in reply to JeanneDamoff @katdish “Why I hate writing (and writers) http://bit.ly/aSJqvk”//That’s not provocative, and no, I didn’t read your rant. (Am I in the 4%?)

Today is @BridgetChumbley’s birthday! Happy Birthday Bridget! (and thanks @helenatrandom for the reminder)

Why, yes…I AM up early this morning!

Great writing comes from the heart, but sometimes that heart needs to be broken before the words can come out. (via @noveldoctor)

Ahhh…..just wrote a really angry rant. And I mean pissy! Can’t decide if I want to publish it or not.

@rmaxwell142 It also has a Wii station, a coffee bar, fresh pastries, and several fish tanks. It’s the house that crooked teeth built.

Well of course my orthodontist’s office has a movie theater. Doesn’t yours? http://twitpic.com/27bgyl

@JeanneDamoff Snort! You sound like BC. (in reply to JeanneDamoff @katdish You’re welcome, bloggerly-but-could-be-writerly-if-she-wanted-to friend.)

@billycoffey @JeanneDamoff Thanks for the RTs my writerly friends!

@weightwhat Because of the gecko/lizard heckling (in reply to weightwhat @katdish Wait, why am I evil this time?)

@muchl8r I don’t think you actually grasp how disgusting those things are. And @weightwhat is just pure evil (in reply to muchl8r @katdish HOW ON EARTH DID I MISS THAT CONVERSATION?! I’m still laughing so hard I might pee my pants. :))

@muchl8r I am NOT a wuss!

@VariantVal I know. That’s why you love me so… (in reply to VariantVal @katdish your kindness knows no bounds)

@JCWert How could I possibly be lonely with all the voices in my head to keep me company?

@VariantVal On second thought. Don’t talk to me. (in reply to VariantVal @katdish how your lizards doing?)

Talk to me…

I hate spam comments. Especially ones disguised as real. “Great site! Lots of useful info here!” Please-you obviously haven’t read my blog.

@marni71 Great minds… (in reply to marni71 Snort! That’s what I was thinking.)

@SBeeCreations Chandlering? What’s that? Like Chandler Bing? (in reply to @SBeeCreations @marni71 Chandlering today! & Soaping! & labeling! & cleaning! Got into a B&M & they want 3 of everything!)

Walking for exercise is impossible with @BuddyLovetheDog. He has to stop and phantom pee on everything.

Despite what many folks will try to tell you, there are few shortcuts in life.

Okay tweetdeck…you’re dead to me.

Hey…is this thing on?

@weightwhat True dat. (in reply to weightwhat @katdish Well, why else would one go to Walmart?)

Sigh…Why do I always get behind people at Walmart who are stocking up for the apocalypse?

@Helenatrandom You hate me, don’t you? (in reply to Helenatrandom @VariantVal She was considering serving them with hot sauce, but I’m trying to talk her out of it. #worchestershiresauce @katdish)

@VariantVal I don’t know. I’ve considered a blow torch, but seeing as though they hang out in the eaves of my house, might not be prudent (in reply to VariantVal @katdish don’t they make lizard repellant? can you throw mothballs around to keep them out.. mothballs seem to work for everything)

@salamicat It’s a gecko. Pretty sure they come straight from the bowels of hell.

@Helenatrandom STOP!!! VURP!!! (in reply to Helenatrandom @katdish Worchestershire Sauce, NOT hot sauce…)

@VariantVal Yes. Then the cat kills them, the dog tries to eat them and vomits them up. It’s like a very disgusting Wild Kingdom. (in reply to VariantVal @katdish Oh my, you’re being invaded by Geiko lizards)

Gaaa! Another one. Welcome to my nightmare! http://twitpic.com/26uks3

RT @billycoffey: Home is not necessarily where you live, but where you are understood.

“Some editors are failed writers, but so are most writers.” ~ T S Elliot

@jewda4 Ninjas…they’re everywhere. (in reply to jewda4 I just lost a bag of animal crackers. I was eating some, took a break to go on stage and sound check, and I don’t remember where i put them.)

Not to sound boastful, but I’m pretty fearless. Mostly. I have a few small phobias. I won’t tell you all of them, but one of them is general disgust of frogs, toads and those disgusting little brown spotted see-thru gecko lizards that I am quite sure come straight from the bowels of Hades. The other night, my husband was walking Buddy Love when he sticks his head in the door and tells me to grab the camera and the kids and come outside. Ugh! Gigantic, disgusting frog. Of course, I happened to on my computer at the time, so I thought I’d share my horror with the twitter. Sorry/you’re welcome. In other news, my daughter’s room is now clean and I conquered the laundry. All of it. Yesh!

The best of me (or not) on the twitter this week:

@gyoung9751 Snort! We could carry on entire conversations w/katdishionary terms alone. (in reply to gyoung9751 @katdish GAAAA! Vurp.)

@gyoung9751 Thanks. Of course….It’s like the Neverending Story, only with headcheese. (in reply to gyoung9751 Katdishionary Part 9, by @katdish http://bit.ly/dotjFe Yay! Another installment!)

@MarketerMikeE Riiiight! (in reply to MarketerMikeE RT @katdish: @MarketerMikeE I think you’re enjoying calling me a ho// Christ like way to say ho is “Ho Ho Ho! Merry Christmas!”)

I think those ads that say “make money from home on your computer” mean “send out 100s of spam comments a day from your home computer”

Oh, good! It’s raining again. I was afraid we weren’t going to have enough mosquitoes this year

Tweetdeck is working. Alas, I have nothing to say…

All aboard the lazy train! Heaven forbid anyone have to walk from the movie theater to the food court. http://twitpic.com/2397a4

@br8kthru True. Half glass full… (in reply to br8kthru RT @katdish: Old Navy Zombies at least they’re cheerful while they eat your brains.)

These look good on. (On fire.) http://twitpic.com/238spq

Old Navy Zombies http://twitpic.com/238rxy

Monkey butt! http://twitpic.com/238ezt

Monkey. http://twitpic.com/238esx

Okay people. Logging off Twitter. Got lives to change, laundry to sort, etc…

Just saw that TNT is showing “Titanic” this week. Am I the only person who saw that movie and said, “Meh…”

Milk and peanut butter sammich: It’s what’s for breakfast.

@CandySteele TWSS (in reply to CandySteele @weightwhat I’ll bet she *really* loves soaking wet ones.)

A fountain pen, of course. Ball point pens are only good for filling out forms on a plane. ~ Graham Green

My 2 fingers on a typewriter have never connected w/my brain. My hand on a pen does. ~ Graham Green

Horse placenta is trending? Um….okay.

@lainiegallagher EXACTLY like now. (in reply to lainiegallagher @katdish It remains to be seen whether you’re right. And even if you were, I’d never admit it. Sort of like now.)

@lainiegallagher Yes. But I’d always be right. Sort of like now. (in reply to lainiegallagher @katdish Hmm. An omnipresent katdish? I’m pretty sure we’d be bickering constantly. I’d NEVER get anything done!)

@lainiegallagher Well thanks. I’m not omnipresent, but you really should listen to me. (in reply to lainiegallagher Just so you know, @katdish is a know-it-all. (But I love her anyway.))

@weightwhat I think all major life decisions should be based on episodes of Man vs Food, personally.

Glad he’s got his priorities straight.

Me: Where are you going to live after college? Son: North Carolina Me: Why? Son: They have really good chicken biscuits.

Daughter & I have moved into the closet. Scary. Found a Teddy bear scotch taped to a hanger.

@SMBlooding Welcome to my nightmare. http://twitpic.com/22s321

@SMBlooding Right now I’m decrapifying my daughters room, so i’m quite horrified at the moment.

@rntammyp Yes. And ewh (in reply to rntammyp @ksluiter @katdish You obviously missed the tweet where I griped about DD going through the trash & retrieving things I threw out. : /)

@SandraHeskaKing I’ll be happy to mail it back to you. (in reply to SandraHeskaKing @katdish That’s mine! Fell out of the back of my head.)

@miller_schloss Counting my blessings, now! (in reply to miller_schloss @katdish I decrapified my kids’ room too. Including sweeping up a mountain of cat litter the baby scooped outta the cat box.)

@makeadiff21 Well, not under the bed next to a bowl w/dried up chocolate ice cream. That’s for sure. (in reply to makeadiff21@katdish Um.. ew! That is funny, though. What exactly did this eye belong to?)

Where did all this crap come from? Gaaaa!

“Oh, mom! I’ve been looking EVERYWHERE for this!” “This” being a lint covered rubber eyeball. http://twitpic.com/22qgvh

Okay, people. Off to the non-virtual world! See ya!

Must begin the decrapification process of the children’s rooms.

And now…I’m going to sleep. Hopefully a frog/lizard/toad nightmare free sleep.

@gyoung9751 Cyber fist bump! (in reply to gyoung9751 @duane_scott I don’t know, Duane, eating a writer is pretty dramatic.)

@duane_scott You ate a writer? What kind after party did you go to tonite? (in reply to duane_scott Dear writer inside me, I know you have things to say, but I’m too tired and too busy. I’m sorry. Love, Mr. Negligent)

@SBeeCreations As opposed to Wendy, the strange internet stalker chick… (in reply to SBeeCreations @weightwhat Last I checked, you were Wendy, but I suppose you could be Jenny, the strange Internet stalker chick)

Tis true>>RT @weightwhat: @duane_scott Nobody wants to hear about your poop. Well, except maybe @redclaydiaries. She’s weird that way.

@sarahmsalter If by “kiss” you mean smack with a baseball bat…Ewh. I can’t do that either. (Shiver) (in reply to sarahmsalter @katdish Awww! He’s a cutie! Kiss him and if he turns into a handsome prince, send him to me… :))

@SBeeCreations SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP! GAAA! (in reply to SBeeCreations @katdish kiss it! Quick!)

Did I mention I have a mild phobia of frogs?

GAAAAAAAA!!!!! GAAAAAA!!!! http://tweetphoto.com/30676769

@CandySteele DO NOT ANGER THE BEAN BOT! (in reply to CandySteele @katdish You’re supposed to apologize for that? Dang, I’ll bet that baked beans bot is REALLY mad.)

RT @mrsflinger: Costco is making me stabby. #holidayshoppingwiththemob

My apologies for not acknowledging being retweeted by the @NonGrumpyCowboy bot. Thanks!

@SBeeCreations I can imagine it does! (in reply to SBeeCreations @katdish Idea of having my very own katdish is rather thrilling :))

@SBeeCreations katdish it up? Ooo! I like that! (in reply to SBeeCreations @sarahmsalter She would build my brand. Get it in local shops, blog, ship, /- basically @katdish it up :))

BREAKING NEWS: It’s still raining.

@lainiegallagher LAWSOME! (in reply to lainiegallagher 80s-themed 30th birthday party. Lame or awesome?)

@WriteOnRideOn I am having a productive weekend so far. I’m showing the laundry room who’s boss. Now if only my children would follow suit.

@redclaydiaries Oh, come on! Dream crusher… (in reply to redclaydiaries @WinLiannefield @katdish I dunno… He’s not verified & no link to a website. I’m a skeptic like that.)

RT @WinLiannefield: @katdish @rayadverb is the REAL Dave Barry. His tweets are few but funny.

@RobinMArnold It must be going around. I wrote an entire grumpy twitter ho post. (in reply to RobinMArnold Husband: Are you grumpy today? Me: Yes. That is all.)

@redclaydiaries Don’t you have local charities that will pick it up? If not, do they allow burning in your neighborhood? (in reply to redclaydiaries @katdish Okay, is there a lazy way to get rid of crap?)

@HisFireFly Wait…@davebarry is on twitter? I may have to break my “don’t follow celebrities who don’t follow you back” rule.

@redclaydiaries Now see…therein lies your problem. Forget making $ from junk, just get rid of that crap! Tough love, Steph. Tough love. in reply to redclaydiaries @katdish But then EVERYONE would know where I live. Plus it’s a lot of work. Isn’t there a lazy way to make $ off ur junk?)

@redclaydiaries You need to have a big, redneck yard sale (in reply to redclaydiaries Needing to craigslist my entire basement. Any ideas on how to overcome craigslist phobia? #theyllknowwhereIlive)

@HisFireFly Nope. Not anywhere close to Manitoba. Did you know that according to Dave Barry, Manitoba literally means “many tubas”

@amysorrells Just think how you would feel if you were a dirty sock! (in reply to amysorrells @katdish I’m shaking, and I’m 1/2 a country away!)

Laundry Room: I will dominate you today! Oh yes–fear me!

image courtesy of photobucket.com

What do you get when you combine rain every single day, grocery shopping, sporatic technical problems with your website, Gmail problems and massive twitter problems? A very cranky katdish. Actually, I didn’t realize I was all that cranky this week. Until I read my tweets.

I think I reached my boiling point yesterday when twitter kept crashing. So, being the mature adult that I am, I tried to find someone to blame. If you are someone who schedules your tweets, please don’t be offended–it’s not you, it’s me…

And now the best of me (or not) on the twitter this week:

SNORT!>>>RT @BigBags: That’s what she said! http://twitpic.com/21us8u

I’m leaving my house. And hey, the back door is unlocked! #4square.

One and only #FF: @billycoffey because he’s all pouty & sad I have more followers than him. Also? He’s the best writer on the internets.

@Sernyl_Dymensha Thanks for the follow. That is the freakiest twitter background I’ve ever seen

I’ve probably offended a few people on Twitter today. Fortunately, they have scheduled all their tweets so they’re not here to read mine.

@MichaelDPerkins I like the ones who say, “Please excuse the auto DM” Why do something you knowingly have to excuse (in reply to MichaelDPerkins @katdish I noticed a few schedule the same verses everyday @ the same time. Really bothers me. Also loathe auto dm’s)

@br8kthru You know me. I’m shy. (in reply to br8kthru @katdish Could you tell us how you really feel? I’m having trouble understanding what you really mean to say :))

@arestlessheart yes please and thank you (in reply to arestlessheart @katdish lol – oh dear. what do you want? I’ve been off corn for months. want some substitutions?)

@duane_scott Thank you for being strong enough to agree with me. Snort! (in reply to duane_scott @katdish Thank you for being strong enough to voice your opinion… I AGREE!)

@MarketerMikeE I’ll take that as a compliment Mike. (in reply to MarketerMikeE @katdish you’re a mean low carb Christian)

I guess I picked the wrong week to give up high-fructose corn syrup.

It’s called “social media” not “Look-how-clever-I-am-talk-amongst-yourselves-media”

This may be the low carb monster talking, but all you people scheduling clever remarks and banter on twitter? UR part of the problem.

And not necessarily in a good way >>RT @SBeeCreations: #FF @katdish but beware, she may change your life

Feeling a bit guilty. Went to Facebook b/c twitter was down. Like hanging out w/your kid brother cuz all your friends are out of town.

RT @Ade1965: Brazil has broken twitter #failwhale

Okay Twitter. Whateva…

@prodigaljohn Twitter, for example (in reply to prodigaljohn Of all human activities, writing is the one for which it is easiest to find excuses not to begin. R. Harris)

@SandraHeskaKing Oh, that’s taken care of. I’m having a Brecktastic day (in reply to SandraHeskaKing @katdish Thanks! Hope you have a less than skunkalicous day!)

@VariantVal Well, I was planning on watching some redneck fireworks in the neighborhood, but if the rain doesn’t stop… …we may have to settle for firearms. (in reply to VariantVal @katdish Thanks for the RT, Kathy .. how are you today? Big plans for the weekend?)

(Breathe) Okay. I did NOT lose my long-winded email, which, come to think of it, maybe isn’t such a good thing

STUPID, STUPID G-MAIL! Just ate a rather long-winded email

RT @marni71: Just found some air freshner. Now it smells like death and lavender.

RT @shrinkingcamel: Whistling at work may be a quaint idea, but in reality it is extremely annoying to everyone else within earshot.

Dear rain: okay. We’re good for now. Thanks. http://twitpic.com/21ra8k

@joannamuses or for white people (in reply to joannamuses @katdish They sure do. Rather odd moves for that song though)

And in other news…Apparently, it’s monsoon season here in Houston.

@curtharding Oooo! I’m telling! (in reply to curtharding Sometimes when I think no one’s watching, I close one eye while using two fingers to smash people’s heads in meetings.)

RT @RobinMArnold: Advice-painters, please use your best painting manners, don’t slop & glop paint. Can’t do that, find something else to do

@gabbysherri SNORT!

(Note: Insert incredibly inappropriate DM here)

@gabbysherri Perhaps I should write a PTA post. (in reply to gabbysherri

@weightwhat -thanks for the RT- I feel a Pit Post coming on!)

@weightwhat I could make some calls. Maybe @gabbysherri could get you a guest spot. (in reply to weightwhat @katdish Yes. Yes it was. And I’m hoping to get booked on Oprah because of it.)

@weightwhat Thanks. And thanks for writing a post. It was very brave of you to share your q-tip addiction.

@redclaydiaries Awesome! Did you hear? @billycoffey got a tatt. Sadly no SEALS or snowballs: http://bit.ly/9FSHF1 (in reply to redclaydiaries @katdish Oh trust me. U were on my mind as I shopped. #cheesebuttlerhasfriends)

@redclaydiaries Hey! Pick me up some deer urine, would ya? (in reply to redclaydiaries Heard of Reefer Madness? This is the redneck version: http://twitpic.com/21anif. #bassproshops)

@Becks_Beer Oh, you silly foreigners! Don’t you know football is played with a brown leather ball? (in reply to Becks_Beer @katdish hahah no we mean football : ))

@Becks_Beer You mean soccer? (in reply to Becks_Beer is anyone else suffering from football withdrawel ???)

@duane_scott Being ill prepared for zombie attack. (in reply to duane_scott I’ve got a question. (May be used In blog) what is one thing that makes you worry?)

Time for my favorite dinner: the one I didn’t cook.

@br8kthru Of course not. But I am freakishly strong for a girl. (in reply to br8kthru @katdish what- are you made of stone, woman!? :))

@br8kthru Nah. But I thought it was touching. (in reply to br8kthru @katdish did you get choked up?)

Went to see Toy Story 3 today. Very well done.

@jiagirl That’s right. Dream big or go home I always say. Or something like that… (in reply to jiagirl @katdish Oh & that person has to steer the wayward cart & then follow you home & unpack. A girl can dream right?)

@jiagirl To make it a pleasant experience for me, folks would interview me & ask what meals I liked., then they would pick out ingredients… And then they would follow me home and prepare the meals for the week, then label & freeze them… I don’t think I’m asking too much. (in reply to jiagirl @katdish Who knows? If they gave you a donut when you walked in & had someone follow you to pack & unpack-then maybe I’d be ok w it.)

I hate grocery shopping…I feel an incessant rant coming on.

Look how this Lexus is parked. Is it any wonder why some animals eat their young? http://twitpic.com/20suxu

And now I must face my arch nemesis: The grocery store.

“A very important blogger? Talk about your oxymorons!” – Sealy Booth, #bones

So many things I want to write about. Need to put pen to paper before they’re lost forever in the whirling mess that is my brain.

RT @tremendousnews: Canadians gave the world Justin Bieber. The world destroyed our city at G20. Touché, world. Touché.

@marni71 You’re so ghetto. (in reply to marni71 @sarahmsalter @katdish Sup yo?)

Well ladies and gentlemen, the wait is over! Here ya go: http://bit.ly/9UL1Oa

Let me ask you a question: How many nights have you lay awake hoping & praying there was a single resource for all katdishionary terms?

@billycoffey You’re one classy redneck! (in reply to billycoffey How I spent my Saturday evening: http://twitpic.com/20au1x)

RT @tremendousnews: The G20 is just like the ’70s! Minus the music, love and not-throwing-poo-at-people.

@sarahmsalter Um…yeah. Because you’re really not refined if you don’t know what “fatassistosis” means (in reply to sarahmsalter @katdish You are SO awesome! You just instinctively know what your public wants/needs. :))

Coming soon to katdish.net: A new tab which will contain all katdishionary terms alphabetically & in one place. I know…you’re welcome.

Gotta go get some hair color. I’m looking very skunkalicious at the moment.

@Helenatrandom Its okay Helen. Go to your happy place. Where you never have to dust. (in reply to Helenatrandom @katdish @sarahmsalter Shame on you people reminding me of places I don’t remember dusting. Ever…)

@SandraHeskaKing oh, I’m not dusting. Sarah is. I’m just giving unsolicited advice. (in reply to SandraHeskaKing @saramsalter @katdish Why are you dusting?)

@unmarketing Congrats. I hear that a fairly competitive softball division. (in reply to unmarketing Hit two triples in fat guy over-30 softball last night. I may need a double leg transplant. Can’t move)

Hey! Remember a few weeks ago when I promised these updates would be much shorter? Well, I lied. But not on purpose. Seems I was extra chatty this week for some reason. Sorry/you’re welcome.

The best of me (or not) on the twitter this week:

RT @noveldoctor: Before reading a revision note from your editor, check the medicine cabinet for Xanax. If empty, drink heavily

@lainiegallagher You know me so well… (in reply to lainiegallagher Sounds about right.)

@lainiegallagher I do what I can. Or what I feel like doing. One of those… (in reply to lainiegallagher Yes! Good one. You’re such a great writer and cheerleader of writers.)

@arlenesg Thanks Arlene. Nice to have you in my stream as well. Even tho typing that makes me giggle.

@SassafrasHill They are sparkly, but also shiny. Because sparkles shine, right? Also? Me too. Book 4 is on my nightstand. (in reply to SassafrasHill @katdish – Sparkly, Kathy. Get it right. Hehehe 🙂 Sparkly & beeyootiful.The books were actually pretty good.Haven’t read the last one tho.)

Is the new Twilight movie coming out today? I am so out of the shiny vampire loop.

@melissa_rae We had pizza tonite too. But in interest of stimulating the local economy, we had it delivered (in reply to melissa_rae We’re making homemade pizza, with from scratch dough, for dinner tonight. Then rootbeer floats for dessert! Mmm!)

As to my earlier tweet about watching The Karate Kid (original) today–I have forgotten how much truly horrible music there was in the 80s

I have no idea where/how/why followers find me, but dang – there are some funny people out there. @plfrederick for example.

@HeatherSunseri Me too. I hate socks.(in reply to HeatherSunseri @katdish Hehehe You have the same suntan I have. Love flip flops!)

Toe-da! http://twitpic.com/1zlz4y

@SandraHeskaKing Oh, it’s okay. You have a great personality. Snort! (in reply to SandraHeskaKing @katdish Double waahhh! I have no tan. Bunions and no tan.)

@SandraHeskaKing Sorry. Didn’t mean to bring you pain. If it’s any consolation, I have an unsightly flip flop tan (in reply to SandraHeskaKing @katdish Waahhh! Sniff.)

@SandraHeskaKing What? I don’t have bunions. What’s a bunion? (in reply to SandraHeskaKing @katdish Scraped and painted sounds lovely! But flip flops show off bunions)

@gyoung9751 Okay. But I’m keeping it handy just in case. I would never lay down the hammer on you, btw. (in reply to gyoung9751 @katdish No! Not the unfollow hammer!)

@MichaelDPerkins Sandwiches and gratuitous violence? 2 of my favorite things!(in reply to MichaelDPerkins RT @katdish: @gyoung9751 Control of what? Do I need go samurai on some people? //I specialize in karate chop sandwiches)

@gyoung9751 Uh oh. Should I lay down the unfollow hammer (in reply to gyoung9751 @katdish Sarah and Duane have been getting out of hand.)

Going to get my feet scraped and painted. It’s flip flop season

@gyoung9751 Control of what? Do I need go samurai on some people? (in reply to gyoung9751 @sarahmsalter You’re right, Sarah. I’d vote to get @katdish to keep things under control.)

Favorite deleted spam comment of the day: Prozac for Cats

@mamastephf Either that or beats the crap out of them when mom’s not looking. (in reply to mamastephf @katdish Ahhh, no wonder you blog so well. The babies are fun & creative, right, in larger families? Everyone applauds them from birth? :))

@adeason123 Well, there are plenty of those folks to go around. (in reply to adeason123 @katdish I personally prefer fake cardboard people… That way I know to NOT expect much from them!!!)

@jamieworley That’s always a bonus.(in reply to jamieworley @katdish It’s nice to have real people. I like when they are fully clothed, too.)

I love checking my new followers to find most of them are real people! Thank you, real people!

@buzzbyannies Or some dynamite. (in reply to buzzbyannies @Katdish Only thing better is fishing with a shotgun.)

@buzzbyannies Rednecks + venomous snakes = quality television! (in reply to buzzbyannies Billy the Exterminator. #digthatshow)

@tracyfarr I meant it as a compliment. (in reply to tracyfarr Oh, no. I’ve turned into a “cranky ho” (as one nice lady recently called me). For shame, for shame, for shame!)

@TheBlueMacaw It better be, or heads are gonna roll! (Okay, really nothing I can do about it. But I feel empowered now.)

@TheBlueMacaw But I’ve got bloggy business I conduct over gmail. They better get it fixed or I’m burning Scranton to the ground! #theoffice

@sarahmsalter @marni71 I’m 5′ 6″ tall. But I towered over @redclaydiaries last year b/c of strategic footwear

@marni71 @sarahmsalter Wait…Sarah, how tall are you? Am I going to look really tall standing next to y’all? Because that would be awesome

@billycoffey Prepare yourself for an expletive-laced DM mister! (in reply to billycoffey @katdish What was that, city slicker?)

@NEgraceful Well, I personally would never say that. I say toe-ma-tas. (in reply to NEgraceful @sarahmsalter @katdish So you would say, “Go pick some may-tuhs for dinner?”)

@marni71 It’s hard to tell. She talks so fast I usually only get about every 3rd word or so. @gabbysherri (in reply to marni71 @katdish Does @gabbysherri mispronouce words or does she only jack them up when she types them?)

@gabbysherri NORTHERN! Bite your tongue! Houston is such a melting pot, everyone is from somewhere else. (in reply to gabbysherri @katdish -not really. Not a Texan accent, anyway. In fact, more Northern than Southern. What’s up with that?)

@sarahmsalter mater plants? Seriously? I can go along with ta-mater plants, but mater plants? Use your words, Sarah. (in reply to sarahmsalter @billycoffey I got a mater plant taller than me now & it’s about to fall over. I got out there w/ baccer sticks & string last night. #nohelp)

@billycoffey Hmph! (in reply to billycoffey @katdish What’d you say, city slicker?)

@gabbysherri Okay, we’ve talked on the phone. Do you think I have an accent?

@marni71 She’s a fast talker…. (in reply to marni71 @katdish Oh,and that time I was hopped up on Nyquil and accidentally drunk dialed @gabbysherri. She didn’t sound at all like a smurf.)

@billycoffey Oh, shut up. (in reply to billycoffey @katdish No. You’re citified all the way. Urban living has destroyed your country roots.)

@marni71 I actually don’t think I have much of an accent. What do you think @billycoffey?

@billycoffey More Frasier than Gomer for sure, but that’s a pretty accurate statement. (in reply to billycoffey @katdish @marni71 @sarahmsalter I have the sort of voice that’s a cross between Gomer Pyle and Frasier Crane.)

@marni71 We’ve never talked on the phone. Doesn’t @helenatrandom sound exactly like you thought she would?

@marni71 Just go to my blog and rant incessantly. I’m there for you, Marns. (in reply to marni71 And now Youversion hates me too. I’m taking my ball and going home…)

HMPH! I just got a DM saying I was high maintenance. I’m not high maintenance, I’m just lazy.

I love @amysorrells , even if her blog posts are always too long to RT.

I had 2 folks follow/unfollow/follow/unfollow me yesterday. If you use an auto-follow service, please note that this is highly annoying.

Garlic butter? RT @HeatherSunseri: Came home from vacation to 100s of snails in fishtank. My DD’s snails mated. Oops. Open to suggestions.

So proud of my kids! Not one argument today! Oh, wait…my son’s away at camp. Nevermind

I just submitted a guest post to a blog geared to writers. I’m giving advice. Brace yourselves.

@KathleenOverby Good morning. We’ve got plenty here. Would you like some suffocating humidity, too? (in reply to KathleenOverby Good morning @katdish. RT Thx 🙂 It is STILL raining. I’m done. Tapping out. Send sun.)

@JeanneDamoff The writing is stellar, but the cowboy hat puts him over the top I think. in reply to JeanneDamoff @katdish Seriously. What is it about some dude in a cowboy hat? (Who just happens to write stories that wring your heart out. But still.)

@JeanneDamoff “Mowing the grass crack”. Snort! (in reply to JeanneDamoff @katdish Hey, congrats on surpassing @billycoffey in followers. And 50 points for the “mowing the grass” crack.)

@JeanneDamoff Exactly (in reply to JeanneDamoff @katdish Wait . . . you’re putting off procrastinating? So, you’ll procrastinate tomorrow then?)

@JeanneDamoff I’m good. I’m putting off procrastinating going to the store.

@SBeeCreations Really? So if I tweeted say, Baby Daddy is a DJ I met at a wedding, I’d be golden? (in reply to SBeeCreations @katdish you need to tweet about weddings, babies, and DJs if you are looking for the quick follow)

You too, @RobinMArnold! Snort!

You rock, @boomerarnold! Thank you!

But I’m going to enjoy my 15 minutes of fame.

YESH! I have surpassed @billycoffey in followers! Of course, he’ll tweet something about mowing the grass & get 100 more followers.

@salamicat My first name is Kathy, my maiden name is Dishman. Hence, katdish

@MarketerMikeE Wait…you scrapbooked? Not sure seeing the A-Team redeems your man card. You should probably cut the head off a snake. (in reply to MarketerMikeE @SeeJaneSell yes lost man card after scrapbooking. Then got it back after watching A-Team.)

@salamicat My twitter name? You mean katdish? That’s not just my twitter name. It’s been my nickname forever (in reply to salamicat @katdish Did you know that the entire reason I followed you originally is because of your twitter name? I love it)

Oooo! We’re tied!

@shrinkingcamel Why thank you, Brad. I would follow myself, but tweetdeck won’t let me. (in reply to shrinkingcamel @katdish I would follow you twice, if that were allowed…)

Tuna casserole…

@RobinMArnold I need 2 more followers to pass @billycoffey. Maybe I should tweet tuna casserole (in reply to RobinMArnold @katdish I imagine we’ll both get them. Last night I tweeted my tuna casserole, now I have folks who know to cook better following.)

@KathleenOverby Sorry/you’re welcome. (in reply to KathleenOverby @katdish love the way your last two posts indulge my bi-polar inclinations. Angels had me tearing up, recap had me laughing. iScared)

And I just had a nekkid person send me a friendship request on facebook. That’s never happened before.

Gotta love the clever spam commenters: Love your writing. Keep up the good work. – Mr. Viagra

A few weeks ago, I attended a dinner party at the home of my husband’s boss and his wife. It was an intimate gathering—four couples. It’s a relatively new company, and the hosts thought it would be a good way for everyone (the wives especially) to put faces to names.

As often is the case in such gatherings, there was much small talk. A conversation which began as the merits of Mac versus PC (or vice versa depending on whether you’ve partaken in the Apple Kool-aid) soon turned to Facebook. Our host asked everyone at the table, “Who of you here has a Facebook account?” My husband was the only one who did not answer in the affirmative. Everyone had an opinion:

“There are people I don’t want to find me”

“I found my best friend from elementary school.”

It’s a great way to keep up with family and friends and see the latest pictures of the grand kids.”

“Facebook is your life, only edited.”

To the last comment I responded, “Facebook status updates are like a never-ending Christmas letter. I have a Facebook account (two actually), but I prefer Twitter.”

Guess who was the only person at the table with a twitter account.

“I tried twitter…I don’t get it.”

“What’s the point of Twitter anyway?”

This left me momentarily speechless—a fairly rare occurrence. Because how does one answer that question?
What is the point of Twitter?

My response was, “What do you want the point of Twitter to be? It can be different things to different people.”

So I posed this question on Twitter and got some interesting responses:

@CandySteele said: I love being able to connect with people and not worry about the spinach in my teeth.

@sarahmsalter said: For the first couple of months I was on Twitter I felt the same way. Then, I “met” you. And @weightwhat. And @Helenatrandom. Et al.

@Helenatrandom said: Socializing. Here is where I group together with my cyber friends, much the same way I used to gather on the great big cubes in Alumni Hall with my friends in college. It is a cyber gathering space. Why not use a chat room? Because that isn’t where my friends are gathering. Does that make me a “follower”. Perhaps. So what?

@marni71 said: Interaction with other snarks. I’m not being snarky in saying that though. And I find I’m challenged (in a good way) by differing opinions and beliefs of others I meet on here. But mostly…snark.

@kellyatlovewell said: I tell people Twitter (for me) is like a huge chat room with some of my favorite online people in it. It’s a lifeline for SAHMs.

@IanAClifford said: Twitter has put me in touch with people I wouldn’t normally be in touch with and sending short messages is normally all I have time for.

@duane_scott said: The point of twitter is connecting with readers and interesting people. A major time killer.

@Davidmota said: Twitter is the place where I get encouraged by other Believers across the world.

@Pauharri said: I feel twitter is so honest and open to anyone I mean you can twitter someone famous,or twitter your neighbour anyone.

@forthegirls said:To expand beyond school, community and family (bc that’s what FB has for me) twitter offers new perspectives!

@NEgraceful said: It’s an easy way to click over to posts quickly. Also, gives me a high ’cause I get followers faster than on blog!

@ Brian_Russell said: Twitter is my place for the comments my mom always told me to keep to myself.

@MarilynYocum said: Twitter: Having a sense of what others are doing/thinking/reading. Trusting them to point out good things, but not overwhelm me.

@BretMcCormick said: Great question….blogging 140 characters at a time is all my ADHD can withstand.

@KathleenOverby said:Twitter is fine tuned. Succinct. Instant conversation. 🙂 Facebook makes me feel sooooooo lonely. A facade somehow? 1000 Friends.??

@mxings said: (in response to Kathleen) FB does not make me feel lonely, but it makes me feel like I am neglecting people, a status does not seem 2B enough.

@jeremypeterson said:Quick thoughts and replies w/o having to deal with dumb things like farmville or mafia 🙂

@togetherforgood said: I’m a fan of facebook. Because none of my “real life” friends are on twitter. I don’t really “get” social media, I think.

@mxings said: I would agree. Twitter can be whatever you want it to be — I prefer it because I feel I have more choice in following/friending There are 2 at work who always say, “Why would I want to tell everyone every time I take a piss?” & the look ‘end of discussion’.

@NovelHelp said: Connecting with people who have similar interests and to learn from their experience and/or help with mine.

@mmerubies said: Twitter is for conversation that completely broadens my horizons.

@jpwire said: Twitter makes me less lonely. other really whacked out people to connect with. LOL.

@SBeeCreations said: Started as a marketing tool &is now an extended network of caring, compassionate, funny friends I don’t know how I survived without.

@UntanglingTales said: I twitter b/c it’s idea-connect w/ greater efficiency than blogging– w/ (frequently) the convenient connection to the actual blog.

@okiewife said: I love twitter for the connections with ordinary but witty folks, uplifting blogs, and all the patriotic love of America comments.

@WriteOnRideOn said: Global communication. Worldwide interaction with people I may never have met otherwise. Mutual support+encouragement. Fun. Writing. Plus, I’m with ya on the FB deal. I don’t do FB. I don’t want to dredge up the past or interact only w/people I already know. Plus, I love the potential and unexpected surprises on Twitter. Love sending out a tweet and meeting new people out of the blue.:) ..without FB “will you be my friend” stuff. I’d rather have public Twitter timeline w/news, friends, writing, shared interests.AND sometimes I actually manage to say what I need to say in 140char or less. I know. Hard to believe right now. LOL :o)

I also received a couple of heartfelt direct messages:

Re: Twitter. Sometimes, I just don’t know. Sometimes I feel it’s just another way to feel lonely as I probably don’t have the outgoing personality to make friends as I see others do. I find it disheartening at times. But when I’m away, I miss it. Go figure.

(a mutual friend) said that I add sunshine to everyone’s day on Twitter. And that surprised me, because in real life, people are always telling me that I’m too much. Too loud. Too fast. Too much. I’m rarely myself because being myself is too much. Too annoying. And I often fear that I’m too much on Twitter, too. Too talkative. Too chatty. Too open. Too “myself.” But she said that the miracle of the Internet is that it allows weirdos like us to discover that we’re not alone. And that’s what it’s done for me. I’ve found a group of people that don’t just TOLERATE me. They CELEBRATE me. (Does it make me pathetic that I’m actually crying while I type this?) I feel like I found a treasure when I found you guys. (Or did you find me?) I don’t care. I just thank God we found each other. I was afraid to laugh or to be silly. I had been led to believe that grown-ups don’t do that. Y’all taught me different.

So there you go. For those of you who are not on the twitter, those are several reasons people choose to connect there. And if you are on twitter, and missed sharing your thoughts on twitter, what’s the point for you?

This week was much ado about followers, following, not following, the courtesy refollow and the likes. I had some fun chats this week, but because of space, most of them didn’t make the update. Oh, and @redclaydiaries and I had some weird conversations. Shocking, I know…

The best of me (or not) on the twitter this week:

@MichaelDPerkins Ah, yes! The “my tweets are educational route”. Nice! (in reply to MichaelDPerkins RT @katdish: Please RT: Follow @katdish! Why? Well, why not? //I did & get vocab lessons now #cheetoes)

Please RT: Follow @katdish! Why? Well, why not?

But let’s make it snappy before he checks his Twitter account shall we?

I think he would really dig that. You want to make @billycoffey happy don’t you?

Hey! For the first time in months, I’m w/in single digits behind @billycoffey in followers. Wonder if I could pass him up today.

@Doallas We drink whatever’s on tap usually. (in reply to Doallas @katdish Just think: esoteric knowledge for cocktail conversation (or conversation over whatever is drunk in Texas)

According to @mrtweets, my influential followers include @johncmaxwell and @tremendousnews. I like to mix things up, people.

And now I must visit Mr. Tweet & find “nice folks who are following you but you are not following back” because I’m nice like that.

@RobinMArnold Because if you’re not, color me impressed.

@RobinMArnold Are you on a riding mower? (in reply to RobinMArnold Right now, I have at least 5 tweeps mowing their lawn. Tweeting whilst mowing, isn’t that illegal?)

I still follow some folks who aren’t following me back, but mostly not.

Snort! >RT @MeMo07: @katdish Whew….I feel like I just got a rose 🙂

@PeterPollock You know I cain’t quit you Peter!

I just unfollowed over 200 people on twitter. But if you can read this tweet, you’re not one of them.

@TchrEric Oh, who cares what @billycoffey likes? He’s on vacation

@Brian_Russell How about, “Thanks for your continued support. Like me on Facebook!” (in reply to Brian_Russell @katdish If it HAD been automated, you’d want to check your settings cause that was LATE.)

@Brian_Russell That DM was dang funny. in reply to Brian_Russell

@Brian_Russell You’d better not be talking about me! (in reply to Brian_Russell I’m not saying who… but someone is a jerk.)

@Brian_Russell Snort! (in reply to Brian_Russell Am I the only one that HATES automated DM’s for following someone? WE KNOW IT’S NOT YOU.)

@givingupperfect Oh, who needs them? Lay down the unfollow hammer! (in reply to givingupperfect @katdish I was inspired to check out who’s not following me by your tweets. And now I’m depressed… :P)

@RachelleGardner Your dog is not following me. I’m mildly offended.

@Brian_Russell Well I figured that. Don’t make me google, Brian. (in reply to Brian_Russell @katdish There’s some programs online.)

Is there an easy way to see who you’re following that are not following back?
@RobinMArnold I’m coming to Atlanta, @redclaydiaries is knitting me a bed out of dog hair, & @charliewetzel will cook. There you go. (in reply to RobinMArnold @redclaydiaries @katdish And I apologize, I didn’t have the umph to roll back to seen all your fun. So much clicking. I’m tired.)

@redclaydiaries Ugh! I’m getting itchy! STOP IT! (in reply to redclaydiaries @katdish Whaaaat? U mean u won’t take it home & treasure it forever? Maybe I should knit u a Callie sweater…)

@redclaydiaries After my stay, you could sell it on Regretsy. (in reply to redclaydiaries @katdish Let me knit one up for you after I vacuum up the last of Callie! #herghostlivesonthebasementstairs)

@redclaydiaries Ooo! May I sleep on a bed of dog hair? (in reply to redclaydiaries @katdish Oooo! Let me check! U can stay with us & my personal chef can cook for you!)

@redclaydiaries I had a dream that we all had dinner w/Donald Miller & I told him I thought his new book was a little whiny.

@redclaydiaries @prodigaljohn is speaking somewhere here this summer, but he won’t tell me where… (in reply to redclaydiaries @katdish I know! I need to find an excuse to go to TX. Any conferences in Houston that I need to attend?)

@redclaydiaries #layersofmeaning? Oh that is RICH!

RT @redclaydiaries: @katdish @billycoffey They could be pelting him with snowballs… #layersofmeaning

Yes! I think that’s it! RT @redclaydiaries: @katdish What, with SEALs chasing a cowboy? @billycoffey

@redclaydiaries Nah. He wants something Navy SEALish. (in reply to redclaydiaries @katdish Abso-freakin-lutely fabulous. How bout a cowboy on a snowdrift…?)

@redclaydiaries Sadly, that was rejected. But how cool would that be? Big red monkey butt w/”Mom” in scrolly lettering? Fabulous. (in reply to redclaydiaries @katdish Oooo… Big. Red. Monkey. Butt?)

@redclaydiaries Yes. A mutual friend of ours is trying to find the perfect design for a tattoo. Told him I might design one. (in reply to redclaydiaries @katdish Fully insane. But the tatts are cool.)

My niece the aspiring artist just drew this on the back of a menu. http://twitpic.com/1xocjn

Okay. Time to go to the big butt Catfish buffet!

@buzzbyannies Thanks for THAT visual! (in reply to buzzbyannies @katdish I killed it with my thong. #flipflop snort!)

@buzzbyannies Really? Those are called pigs in a blanket here. Twitter is so educational. (in reply to buzzbyannies @katdish Oooh, luhv catfish. Luhv. Southern Hushpuppies, not so much. Hushpuppies here are hotdogs in a crescent roll. Dig those.)

This tan & white one is Bo. He’s like a dog, only smaller. http://twitpic.com/1xe7sj

Watching paint dry. Literally. http://twitpic.com/1x0yyo

Off to paint the town red, or a dining room green…One of those…

@BridgetChumbley I’m a fast typer. No one can take that away from me. Well, unless they smashed my fingers I guess. (in reply to BridgetChumbley @katdish Look at you… Spot 1 AND 2… Nice!)

Watching Billy the Exterminator on A&E: Rednecks + venomous snakes = quality television

RT @ryanmer: How do people watch soccer games w/o drinking? That’s like making a grilled cheese sandwich w/o cheese. Or bread. Or drinking.

Just received an email about the smartypants blog saying they were “super impressed by its design & content”. Clearly, this is spam.

***

BTW – @billycoffey still has more followers than I do. I would never suggest you UNFOLLOW him, but if your dog was to unfollow him, I think I could live with that. I mean come on–he almost never has conversations with dogs. On twitter. Anymore.

It was a very light week on the twitter for me. I had my first painting gig in quite some time, so I was away from my computer and my phone quite a bit. So this update is short and sweet–Just like me only completely different…

The best of me (or not) on the twitter this week:

@billycoffey Well now. What am I supposed to do with that? (in reply to billycoffey Hey @katdish, Astros play the Yanks this weekend. I’m sorry in advance.)

@mxings Thanks. @billycoffey was being writerly, so I figured I’d be painterly. (in reply to mxings RT @katdish: Painting blues http://bit.ly/92jatJ // I liked the #ampainting tag from this morning : ) first *snort* of my day)

Finished painting. Another day, another dollar. Adjusted for inflation, of course.

@curtharding Thanks for the #FF. 4 out of 5 dentists agree! (in reply to curtharding Following these folks will whiten your teeth. @johnthebogwaan @katdish @KristenBaird @cduncan75 @joeljmiller)

My one and only #FF: @lainiegallagher: Because she’s all up in my grill, and yet I find her strangely delightful!

Dang it!….hiccups!

@JeffHolton I love that song! I wore out that Cure CD. (in reply to JeffHolton RT @katdish: @JeffHolton It’s not easy being me. Oh, who am I kidding? It rocks. // Why can’t I be you? …Hey, that’d make a great song!!)

@JeffHolton It’s not easy being me. Oh, who am I kidding? It rocks. (in reply to JeffHolton @katdish Stuff it, Richards!! Oh, er, I mean…wow, I’m happy for you. :))

@JeffHolton Oh…is that supposed to be imaginary? That’s pretty much my world. (in reply to JeffHolton In my imaginary world, I don’t have a full-time job. I just blog and write as the muse strikes. And people give me food and schwag for it.)

I suppose “early” is a relative term for a teenager.

My son told me last night he wanted to get up bright & early to go to the driving range. It’s 10:30 & he’s still asleep.

@curtharding TMI, Curt…TMI. (in reply to curtharding The World Cup brings up memories of my dating life…I had trouble scoring too.)

@jamieworley Not yet. But the day is young! (in reply to jamieworley @katdish 9hrs after you asked, I’m finally answering! 😛 I’m good. How ’bout you? Anyone fallen off your house lately, or is that just me?)

@muchl8r Good morning Sunshine! (in reply to muchl8r Fake-happy morning tweet. Good at sounding positive even though I slept like crap. Heaven forbid anyone sound contentious.)

“Do everything with excellence. It’ll make Jesus proud and keep me from killing you.” ~ @muchl8r

@lainiegallagher It’s your world, I’m just trying to live in it.

@lainiegallagher Snort! You know, I would go to considerable lengths to have a bag printed w/an E, just to drive you nuts. (in reply to lainiegallagher @katdish Liar!)

@lainiegallagher Not on the bag I have. Mine has an E (in reply to lainiegallagher @katdish #1, the plural of Cheeto is Cheetos. No E.)

@lainiegallagher cruh-doodles? Are those like store brand Cheetoes? (in reply to lainiegallagher Ever have ice suddenly shift in your cup in a silent room? It just scared the cruh-doodles out of me.)

And that’s why you bloggy love me! RT @lainiegallagher: @duane_scott That’s okay. No one is as random as @katdish.

@gyoung9751 I’m here now, Glynn. All is right with the world again. (in reply to gyoung9751 @katdish Thanks for the RT. We’ve had no rants, no GAAAs, no clown alerts, no sky mall catalogs — it’s been miserable.)

(crickets chirping)

Hey! WHO MISSED ME? (Please do not crash the twitter with your responses)

@PeterPollock Snort! I’m finding your british wit delightful this afternoon. Maybe it’s the paint fumes. (in reply to PeterPollock @katdish it was a few years ago)

@PeterPollock yes. Been making gifts. When’s your birthday again? (in reply to PeterPollock @katdish You’ve been painting poop all day long?)

Been painting all day long. Pooped!

Just finished loading up my jeep with all my painting stuff. Forgot how much stuff you have to lug around!
Decided to accept a painting job. Went to quote one room, which has now turned into 3 rooms. Sigh. Guess I’m a painter again

I’ve had a head cold that has now settled into my chest. Pardon me while I go cough up a lung…

Today’s guest blogger is another friend I connected with on Twitter, made my way to her blog, and found yet another wonderful writer as well as a great encourager.

Cassandra Frear has homeschooled her sons through high school, led three grassroots ministries for families, taught seminars, and served as a teacher, speaker, and lay counselor. She enjoys reading, writing, hiking, and living to tell about it all. You can find her at her blog, The Moonboat Cafe.

The first thing you should know is that Katdish did not ask me to write about this topic. She’s not responsible for anything I say here. Instead, she told me to write about whatever comes to mind. And that’s where the trouble started.

This post has been brewing for some time. Now that it’s espresso strength, I’m serving it up. Consider it your first cup of the day. As in,”Wake up, people!” But I will try not to be rude. After all, I can’t break one of my Cardinal Rules for Social Media in a blog post on Twitter. I will be nice.

This all started when I was online one afternoon and several tweets about things which should not be mentioned in public passed before my eyes on my PC screen. I thought to myself, “What am I doing here? How can I justify reading this?” Past comments from friends and family came streaming into my thoughts.

“What is it with Twitter? What’s the big deal?”

“I just don’t get the Twitter thing. Why are you doing it?”

“I’m not going to chat with people through short messages. That’s not a conversation! ”

“Boy, you must have a lot of extra time on your hands!”

Then, my all-time favorite: silent laughter, guffaws, chuckles, sideways glances, and smirks. Really? Am I serious?

Ahem. Yes.

Why I Give A Hoot

Here’s why I do Twitter. I’m betting this is why you do it, too. Mostly.

1.Information: My husband, a news editor, has recently set up a Twitter account. He’s amazed at the volume of immediate and succint information coming through the Tweet pike. He has his finger on the pulse of the world. He’s organized his sources, so he can select the kind of data he wants. In minutes, he can skim and know if there is anything he should pay close attention to. It’s better, far better, than the evening news. This is just one example of what Twitter does best — it carries information rapidly and efficiently.

2.Inspiration: More than once, I’ve gotten a needed lift from a tweet on Twitter. At just the right time, there is an image or a quote which encourages me and restores my perspective. I know it seems odd that I could find this at 140 characters a pop. But it happens to me several times a week. God can use anything, even a tweet.

3.Interaction: I’ve gotten to know many writers and wonderful people on Twitter whom I would not have met otherwise. Before joining, I wondered how in the world this could happen with short tweets. But it does. I think we get to know each other better sometimes when other distractions are not in the way. We can see the soul behind the setting when all is pared back to a few words. And it’s not the words themselves — it’s the way the person reacts that tells me who they are.

I’ve prayed for people in crisis on Twitter, pointed them to helpful books, shared recipes, sent encouraging notes, and learned lessons on writing from them. It’s a virtual community. Amazing, isn’t it?

4.Innovation: I ‘ve noticed a recent trend. Some of us are beginning to use Twitter to create, to come up with new concepts, and to build a whole new vocabulary. Tweeters co-write things on Twitter, brainstorm for ideas, and solve problems together. You can tweet about your issues in North Dakota and in a few minutes hear from someone in Ireland who had the same problem and found a great solution. Twitter can be faster than a phone call to a customer service representative and ten times more effective.

As I said, it’s a community. But one without walls or time constraints. And it’s one worth belonging to.

Are you on Twitter? How has it helped you? If you’re not on yet, do you think you might be interested?

To read more from Cassandra Frear, visit her at her blog Moonboat Cafe and follow her on twitter at @CassandraFrear.

I connected with Mike on Twitter. I’m going be honest. I follow a bunch of people on there. If you want my attention, you have to actually talk to me directly. Which he did. (I think it was something sarcastic, which pretty much always gets my attention.) Anyway, I think Mike’s story about connecting to folks on Twitter is pretty cool. Here’s Mike:

Before I became a Tweep I had no idea that Twitter could be used as an evangelism tool. After I created my Twitter account in May of 2009 it didn’t take long to see that Twitter is chock full of Tweeps who will connect with you if you’ll take the time to find, watch, listen, engage and share with them. Tweeps on Twitter are waiting for Christ followers who will be real, authentic and transparent. What else? If you want success in Twitter evangelism you must be non-judgmental, loving and willing to connect with people that don’t believe, think, look or live like you. In my opinion we need to “love people to Jesus”. I am going to share stories about the people who come to bible studies, volunteer at the homeless ministry and go to church due to connections they’ve made with my friend, my pastor and me through Twitter.

Kelly’s Twitter name is @pagankelly. Her Twitter bio reads: “Wiccan, Wife, and Mother”. I connected with Kelly on Twitter and then had coffee with her and other Tweeps at weekly Tweetups in Daytona Beach, Florida. After a few Tweetups she eventually asked me a question, “Mike, my kids have been talking about going to church. What is the name of that church you belong to?” Kelly, her husband Jeff (@the chef_ on Twitter), daughter Teri and son Michael came to church. It was the first time that Kelly, Jeff and the kids came to church together as a family. Along with regular visits to church, they’ve attended Sunday school and volunteered their time during special events. After the connection on Twitter why did Kelly and her family come? “You knew who I was and you invited me. You knew I wasn’t a Christian and it didn’t matter”, Kelly said. Kelly sent this Twitter direct message to me today, “Thank you for being my friend.”

Christine’s (@ChristineBlake) Twitter bio is unique: “Selling drugs out of the trunk of my car”. Before you make any judgments, Christine is a pharmaceutical sales representative. Christine is Catholic and her son attends Catholic school. Due to parent concerns, her son’s school discontinued a tradition of the kids preparing and serving lunch to the homeless. It was a disappointment to Christine. She began looking for other opportunities for her son to serve the less fortunate. Prior to this Christine and I connected through Twitter but she took notice when I tweeted about the homeless ministry at my church. Christine and her son helped serve dinner several times, donated clothing and even rounded up cots for our homeless friends to sleep on. Lately I have been tweeting about a weekly bible study at my friend Russell’s home and Christine is coming. It’s the first time she has ever been to bible study. Last night she told me, “I didn’t know Methodists had bible studies. I thought only Baptists did that!” After the Twitter connection why did Christine serve the homeless and come to the bible study? “You knew I had a church and you were cool with that. I also knew you weren’t going to Jehovah witness me,” said Christine.

Elaine (@ebmk16) and I met at one of the weekly coffee Tweetups. She was attending another church not too far from mine. Elaine watched what my friend, my pastor and I were tweeting. What I didn’t know was that she was struggling to connect and get involved in the church she was attending. Elaine began to see my tweets about getting involved in the homeless ministry. One night she came to our church to serve. She took her involvement to another level when she began knitting scarves for each of our homeless friends. Soon Elaine was attending church on a weekly basis and just recently became a member. After the Twitter connection what brought Elaine to church? “You were demonstrating God on earth. You pulled me in by making it easy to get involved and connected.”

After 13 years of being away from church Twitter, Nascar and a tweeting pastor brought Dana (@Dana88) back. It was the 4th of July. Dana was watching the Pepsi 400 on TV and watching tweets on Twitter about her favorite drivers. She noticed that someone new was following her. She checked out his bio and the website listed on his Twitter page. It was Tom Nelson ( @TomForPeace) the pastor of my church. Earlier that same day I spent several hours with Tom teaching him how to use Twitter. I showed him how to intentionally find people, begin following and connecting with them. One of those people was Dana. The next day, Sunday July 5th, Dana came to church. Since last July Dana has been attending church on a weekly basis. After the Twitter connection what brought Dana back to church? “You didn’t pressure me or use fear. You shared openly and were real, “Dana said.

When Christie moved to Daytona Beach, FL she began attending a singles group at church. It wasn’t long before she was being judged about having a TV, her work schedule and the probing questions she asked about the bible. She stopped attending church. I met Christie by connecting through Twitter. Not long after that we met in person at coffee Tweetups. At the Tweetups and on Twitter, Christie heard about the homeless ministry at my church. She traveled to thrift shops and stores to round up and then donate clothes for the homeless. Christie hasn’t been to a church service yet but she plans on doing it soon. She’s been away from church since 2001. After the Twitter connection what would make her consider coming back? Christie said, “You aren’t uptight, pushy or try to put unrealistic expectations on me. You’re friendly.”

Jane (@SeeJaneSell) stopped attending church 25 years ago. I met Jane at a coffee Tweetup and didn’t see her again until she showed up at a cold weather shelter for the homeless at the church. She had a horrible day at work and saw tweets about helping at the shelter. Instead of sulking she came to serve others. The next step for Jane was attending church. She now attends church weekly. Last Sunday Jane became a member of the church. After the Twitter connection what brought Jane back to church? She said, “I felt like something was pointing me there. You weren’t pushy. You opened up your arms to me and I felt like I belonged.”

What are you doing to intentionally find, follow, connect, engage, share and reach out to people through social media?

How do you search and find people on Twitter? Click here.

Would you like to see another post I wrote on Twitter Evangelism? Click here.

What is a Tweetup? Find out by clicking here.

Mike Ellis is a messed up Christ follower. The church he writes about in this post is First United Methodist Church in Port Orange, FL. He has been working in promotion and marketing for 31 years. He is not a social media expert but he does know enough to be dangerous. You can connect with Mike through his blog and follow him on Twitter at @MarketerMikeE.

image courtesy of photobucket.com

I’m sort of re-thinking the weekly twitter update. I’m toying with the idea of actually writing about social media in general and Twitter specifically. I’m still undecided about that at the moment. But I do know that these posts have become really time consuming to write, so I’ve decided to start posting very edited versions of what I tweeted for the week. If you follow me on twitter (and why wouldn’t you?), you may remember that I posed the question: “What is the point of Twitter for you?” I got some very candid and interesting answers. Stay tuned for a post on that very soon. In the meantime…

The best of me (or not) on the twitter this week:

Bahamabob And the moral of the story? Write a few good books, then you can coast.

RT @Bahamabob: John Grisham’s A Time to Kill was rejected by 16 publishers before finding an agent who eventually rejected him as well

You know, when I get an email with the subject line: MUST SEE, I delete it. Because you’re not the boss of me…

Not that there’s anything wrong with that…

What’s up w/the comments about the Barbies in the box? It’s not like I dismembered them or anything http://bit.ly/am0IAR

Just saw someone wearing a shirt that said “werewolves beware” which would have been cute if not worn by a 40yo woman.

This year’s theme: You are special. Just like everyone else. Which coincidentally was last year’s theme.

On my way to 3rd grade awards ceremony at my girl’s school.

@WriteOnRideOn If “Ifs” were fifths, we’d all be drunk.

@duane_scott Singing. Practice for Sunday morning. We also pray together & make obscure pop culture references.

@sarahmsalter Yes. I am more experienced than you are, but immaturity can be timeless.

@CandySteele No. I only accept compliments about @billycoffey’s blog. @peterpollock is the complaint dept.

@MarketerMikeE And all the people said, “Amen”

@MarketerMikeE World famous? You must have me confused with another katdish. Oh, who am I kidding? There’s only one me.

Oh, you sneaky spammers! Best salutation of the day: Always yours, Mr. Cialis

RT @noveldoctor: The best moments in writing and life are the ones that bring unscripted smiles

“If it wasn’t for secretaries I wouldn’t have a step-mom.” – Andy #theoffice

Woke up this morning w/the final scene of #24 still fresh on my mind. I cain’t quit you, Jack Bauer!!!

Now if you’ll all excuse me. I’m a little verclempt…Talk amongst yourselves…#24

Jack Bauer is THE MAN! #24

Okay….when do they start filming the movie? #24

I repeat: GAAAAAAAAAA!!!!! #24

GAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!! #24

RT @Iconic88: “Facebook is the people you went to school with. Twitter is the people you wished you went to school with. @twittelator”

So I ask you, lovely people: What’s the point if Twitter for you?

The response? “I don’t get Twitter. What’s the point of Twitter?” To which I said, the point is what you want the point to be.

The other night at a dinner party people were talking about Facebook. I said I had a facebook account, but that I preferred Twitter.

@lainiegallagher You drive me crazy. You know that, right?

@KathleenOverby Oh, wait…Don’t tell him I said that.

@KathleenOverby Yes, but @billycoffey watches an obscene amount of television.

That last waffle iron tweet was meant for @PrairieLady . Literally makes no sense when talking to myself

@katdish I couldn’t use one. It would go right next to the waffle iron I never use.

And now, I’m back inside. Stupid nature…

Not sure I like the scented body lotion I’m wearing, but the wasp in my garage seems to.

But seriously…I really need to cut my fingernails…

Don’t you hate it when people tweet stuff like, “I really need to cut my fingernails?”

@redclaydiaries Only if your grampa is a shiny vampire.

@redclaydiaries I need 6 hours of sleep. No more. I can’t explain it.

And people gonna treat you better, you’re gonna find, yes you will, that you’re beautiful as you feel ~ Carol King

You’ve got to get up every morning w/a smile on your face & show the world all the love in your heart ~ Carol King